(Closed) The Save the Date Dilemma

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
46402 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

ljmarschall:  Are you having a destination wedding, a wedding on a holiday weekend, or expecting a lot of people to have to travel?

Post # 4
720 posts
Busy bee

If you’re taking about Memorial Day weekend, then I would say that’s it’s more than fair and sufficient notice to send your Save-The-Date Cards by Thanksgiving regardless of when your relative’s wedding is taking place.  In my opinion, your STD doesn’t steal her thunder.  Now, if you’re envisioning sending your Save-The-Date Cards much earlier than 6 months in advance, then, yes, perhaps you could wait until after your relatives wedding.  That could be seen by some as you trying to steal attention.

Personally, I will be sending my STD right around the time of a good friend’s wedding and 3 weeks before a family wedding, but as it will be 6 months before my wedding, I think that’s perfectly fine.

Post # 5
3731 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

ljmarschall:  Unless your invite hinges upon getting a thank you from this person, send the Save-The-Date Cards whenever it’s right. You don’t need to wait for anything to send them off! She had her one day and then life moved on. Send them!

Post # 6
559 posts
Busy bee

ljmarschall:  If you’ve been engaged forever, they will have been expecting your save the dates for a while. No worries.

Post # 7
77 posts
Worker bee

I would say send them whenever works for you. We sent ours out about 8 months in advance because we (well I) have family travelling from all over the country/world. We actually did hold off sending them by 2 weeks because my grandmother died and it felt kind of tacky to send them so close to the funeral. BUT since you’re contending with a wedding, and not a funeral, I would say send them whenever you’re comfortable with it. Everyone loves having TWO happy occasions to celebrate! 🙂

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