(Closed) The Secrets of a Happy Marriage

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I read those articles a while ago, some have good stuff. I think good communication is key (obvs) as well as knowing how to communicate with each other.  We both have different ways of communicating, so knowing what works for the other person is really key. 

Take time for each other, and never take the other person for granted. I have learned this all too well in my marriage over the last few months. My husband has shown me what true love really is, that’s for sure

Post # 4
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

When making decisions together, even if you don’t get your way, be happy because you’ve made your SO happy. Especially when it comes to which restaurant to eat at and what to watch on TV. Sometimes making them happy ends up being more fulfilling than getting what you want.

Post # 5
113 posts
Blushing bee

Keeping things in perspective.

I didn’t marry only to be divorced in 10 years. We’ve decided to discipline ourselves to love; so in those “difficult” moments (there aren’t many), we decide that the love the other person needs is more important than us driving home our point, hurting the other person, or generally being selfish.

It isn’t about me, or him, but us as a whole. Truly, no room for selfishness, just love and tenderness

Post # 6
10 posts
  • Wedding: March 2012

I have 2 favorite pieces of advice that I have been trying to keep with me at all times and follow.

One I read in a magazine article, it was a family therapist and he said not to sweat the small stuff. If it doesn’t affect the grand scheme of things, let it go.

The second someone said it in a post, at the end of the day, you should be trying to win your husband, not a fight.

It has really helped.

Post # 7
4038 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

For us, it’s appreciation–remembering to say “thank you”, even for the little stuff, like thanking him taking out the trash even though he does it every week, or cleaning the litter boxes because it makes me gag, or him thanking me for making dinner or doing the dishes.  

Post # 8
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012


I try to live by the motto of “Be considerate in what you say, and generous in what you hear”

meaning I try to be kind and clear when I say/ask something and not defensive or snarky, and I always make the assumption that when my fiance says something to me, it has the best (kindest) meaning even if it is expressed in a way that irks or rubs me the wrong way.

We also dont bring up the “You never/always/6months ago you didn’t” type stuff but try as much as we can to focus on the future.

Try to use humor to resolve conflicts instead of getting mad.

Always say thank you/please

Also, since my fiance is very responsive to me, and treats me as well as I treat her, it’s pretty easy for me to do stuff for her because I find myself wanting to, and she does things for me too.

Absolutely no name-calling

We definitely have frustrations from time to time, but I think we have an awesome relationship overall.

— Nick

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