- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2017
Ladies, I am feeling so sad today and I don’t know why. We are a couple days away from our 3 year anniversary and now I just feel kind of blue. My SO got back from his business trip yesterday and he is clearly very exhausted. He had to do a lot of traveling, so I feel bad for him that he is tired and he totally deserves to sleep, veg out, and do little to nothing. However, I was really excited to see him when he got home and he was just grumpy and tired. Again, I totally get it, but he was gone over a week bees, so I missed him! Plus, our anniversary is so soon that I was feeling so mushy and happy for him to be back.
He is also in school right now and very busy with work. Like I said in a previous post, I don’t think that he will be planning anything for our anniversary because he has so much other stuff going on. And actually, this is sad, but I don’t think he even REMEMBERS it is our anniversary this weekend. That makes me really sad, although I am trying really hard to be understanding that maybe our anniversary isn’t the priority right now when he has so much school, work, and travel going on right now. I feel like I can’t bug him much about our anniversary because he doesn’t even have time to think about it.
So that being said…I guess right now my plan is to just try and let our anniversary go…I don’t think he’ll have much time to do anything this weekend anyway. I am going to try to get some takeout from a place that we like, along with a bottle of wine, so that we can at least have a nice dinner together. I am trying to be understanding, but I’m just feeling kind of sad. I know that he won’t propose, but after 3 years, I sure wish he would. And it is kind of sad, but in a weird way I feel like I deserve it. I have been doing so much for him while he has been busy – cooking, cleaning, take care of him, making sure stuff gets done around the house, listening to him talk through assignments and frustrations, etc. I have been very supportive and helpful and conscious of his schedule and all his work. He misses lots of events because of needing to do school work, so I fly solo at a lot of things like parties and family activities. Maybe it is silly to feel like I deserve an engagement, but jeez – I at least deserve something for everything I have done. Some sort of appreciation, even if it is a small surprise on our anniversary like making me breakfast or taking me out to dinner. I guess I just want a little surprise or something. A sign of appreciation for supporting him through all this. I mean, REALLY, I’d love for him to propose, but I know it won’t happen.
Sigh!!! Could use some words of support, bees! I am so happy to be celebrating 3 years with this wonderful and amazing man, but sometimes I just get sad and wish he had just a little bit more time to prioritze me, at least for our anniversary!! And today is one of those days.