- 5 years ago
I need advice.
Here’s our (abrreviated) story:
My boyfriend and I celebrated our 7th anniversary last month. We have been dating since high school. He went to college out of state, and we spent three years long distance before I moved to be with him. Last summer, we started talking casually about getting married.
Over the last several months our sex life has slowed way down. In the last month, we might have gotten intimate three times. I just don’t want to do it anymore. I don’t get in the mood ever. I WANT to want to, I just cant get into it…We used to do it three times a day when we were together. Granted, I know it’s normal to slow down, but I am starting to feel like we are best friends rather than significant others. We don’t even really kiss, aside from little pecks on the lips.
I was thinking about our wedding last night (I’m not actually engaged, just daydreaming) and I realized that I could no longer picture being married to him.
I love him and I know he loves me. There is no doubt in my mind about it. We do little, sweet things for each other, such as I got him a bunch of snacks and things for a trip he was taking with his friends for a tournament and I knew he was busy and didn’t have time to get them himself. When I was really upset recently, he spent two hours trying to cheer me up and talk me through my fears. I know these feelings are real. I also know that relationships are not easy– sometimes you have to work to keep them alive. I am not willing to give this up. I just don’t know how to bring the passion back to our relationship when I never want sex.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation and GOTTEN THROUGH IT? What did you do?