Post # 1
Today I received part of a text messaging session between my sisters on accident. One of my sisters was telling the other that I should ask for help registering. I didn’t have enough items, I didn’t select enough enough items under @20, and that she had no idea why I registered at Crate and Barrel because there isn’t one where we are getting married or where I live (yet there is one an hour from where I live and all my friends shop online).
Our wedding is six months from now and two weeks ago when I was bored at home, I started a registry at C&B and BBB, started being the key word. I have yet to find time to finish registering online, go to the store, or hit Target to find more of the less expensive items. Neither one of them has asked me if I’ve registered or where I’ve registered. In fact, I haven’t even told anyone I’ve started registering, although I’m well aware a simple search is all it takes to find out. I just didn’t expect with no showers planned and 6 months out that anyone would look.
I guess this is more of a vent then anything. I know better than to talk to either one until I’ve cooled down, because this isn’t worth blowing up any more, and I want to make sure I don’t say anything to make the situation worse. I did send a text to both telling them they might want to check who their messages are going to, and since then it’s been a stream of don’t be mad texts and I don’t know the whole story. Sure, I don’t but I did see what I did, which I personally find hard to interpret any other way. Between changing the wedding date, the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress color & style due to their strong objections, and now this, I’m just sad to call them my sisters right now.
Post # 3
Password protect both registries until you’re able to complete them and “publish” them. Easy peasy.
Post # 4
The only text message you received was about how you should get help for registering. Basically she critiqued where you registered. Why is that upsetting you? It’s not like your dress; you can just tell her you like their stuff! They could’ve been talking about anything! You’ll get around to it; it’s not like it’s rocket science adding things to your registry. Just the idea that they’re talking behind yoru back i’m sure is annoying, but sisters do that =
Post # 5
That’s rediculous. I would be upset too! Even if you don’t know what’s going on, what other explaination can there be? Are either of them married? Do they know that you don’t need to have these decisions done until much closer to the wedding? And if your friends shop online or are taking a trip to the cities to be able to go to C&B, then who cares if you registered there!
Definitely just give it a little time. Relax, enjoy the snow (and Valentine’s Day!), and come back to it in a few days.
Post # 6
I don’t really see what’s mean about saying you aren’t registered for enough stuff when you say that you aren’t registered for enough stuff because you haven’t gotten around to it. Nothing wrong with not getting around to it yet but what’s wrong with just pointing that out to each other – I might see it as annoying if they were bugging you… but I don’t see what’s the big deal here is. Was there also a text message saying you’re a terrible person because your registry isn’t complete? 🙂
Post # 7
I suppose this bothered me because it is one more thing about my wedding that my sister’s have voiced displeasure over. I realize one’s wedding is a big deal only to the two people it involves, so I avoid bringing the topic up. When the topic has come up, I have heard nothing but complaints or snark from one sister. My other sister has completely avoided the topic with me. So, while a stronger person wouldn’t have hurt feelings, I am tender hearted and it does hurt. I guess my point was, if they had a question about my registry or lack thereof, they could have asked me. If there wasn’t some guilty feeling on their part, I’m guessing I wouldn’t have gotten so many text messages from them this afternoon. No worries, I’m over it. 🙂
Post # 8
I’d be annoyed, too. Sure, they weren’t saying anything you don’t agree with, but it’s the fact that they didn’t talk to you and were doing it behind your back. I’m sorry they did that. *hugs*
Post # 9
My mom found out about the wedding because I had already started my wedding website/registry on BBB before we were officially engaged. Bad idea, I know. Now I password protect everything and don’t publish it until I’m ready!
PS-If you REALLY want to have fun with them, fill your C&B registry with a bunch of really weird things and focus on your BB&B and Target registries for your real stuff. Or tell them you’re registered on Amazon.com and register for a bunch of crazy stuff there!
Post # 10
Try not to worry about it too much. Maybe they were just discussing it between themselves to see if they agreed that you probably needed more items on there. I know a lot of times if I am not sure if I should approach a subject I will bounce the idea off of a friend first. Maybe they were just checking with each other and then going to bring it up to yu.
Post # 11
Since it wasn’t directed at you I wouldn’t worry about it. They were probably just discussing whether you were finished or not and probably hoping that you hadn’t just stopped where you did on the list. If they bring it up just explain that you’re working on it. Could be that one of them was planning on getting you a small gift since you’re not having a shower and noticed how little there was on there.
Post # 12
Don’t worry, like caszos said. Everything will be scrutinized about your wedding, but just reply with, thanks for your input, but it is my wedding afterall. And give ’em a cheesy grin and love that you are in control.
Post # 13
Maybe they are planning a shower for you and would like to see some more choices and some at lower prices, so more people can afford to purchase you something you actually need.
Post # 14
I would feel hurt too. I have two sisters and if this happened to me, I would be be upset. I sould just tell them it upset you that they talked about it behind your back and that they should have asked you about it.
Try not to let it get you too down. I think if this is the worst thing that happens during wedding planning you will be just fine, other wise kick ’em out (ok not really )
Post # 15
That is annoying. I will say though, my sister barely registered for anything beyond about 1,000 wine glasses from BB&B and her shower was so boring and the ‘bridal bingo’ a flop since every present opened was a wine glass of some sort. Seriously, she registered for like 4 different sets of them, I have no idea why she needed so many.
But I agree with password protecting for now, there’s no need for everyone to get all uppity when you haven’t even completed the registry.
Post # 16
- Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School
I would def be hurt, since they weren’t texting YOU, they were texting eachother saying negative things about your registry…That’s not very nice! I think you have the right attitude not to say anything until you’ve calmed down some but it might be worth having a chat with both of them, starting with the texts but mentioning some of the other things you posted about that hurt you as well…