Post # 1
Has anyone else had trouble with “the changing times”? We’ve gotten comments from both sets of parents (and grandparents!) about “things weren’t like this when we got married.” For example, “we just had cake and punch in the church fellowship hall” or “we would never have dreamed of spending that much on photography.” Are they just acknowledging that things are different now, or are they actually wanting us to have just cake and punch?? I’m not sure of the difference between complaining and wishful thinking. Regardless, it’s frustrating. Things ARE different now. I know the wedding industry makes money hand over fist, but we would really like to have a nice wedding. Unfortunately, it’s the kind of wedding that people expect now. We’re not asking them to pay for anything we’ve picked, so I’m not sure why I have to hear about “how things used to be.”
In general, I’m just getting tired of other people volunteering [negative] opinions about the wedding. Anybody out there feel the same?
Post # 3
Well, 50 years ago, i’m sure things WERE cheaper. For photography specifically, I think you get so much more out of the photography now than you did then – it’s a whole photojournalistic day, not just posed shots like it used to be. So yes, that costs more, even after inflation and cost of living are taken into account. And cake/punch receptions just aren’t the trend now. It’s not that they are bad or never done, it’s just that a sit-down dinner is the popular choice these days. None of which is your fault!
Post # 4
As a mom of a fairly recent bride, I think that parents and grandparents can get “sticker shock”. And also, the economy is so bad, I think it can really be difficult for some families to pay for weddings “these days”, and I think they may feel extremely bad about that, even if they don’t want to acknowledge it to the bride/groom or anyone else. I know that I wanted to give my daughter “her dream wedding” and I did manage that on a very tight budget, with LOTS of searching for the Best Prices on everything-because I have my own grad school loans-and the most debt I have ever been in. 🙁 I was “accused” of “planning their wedding” but when I “made it happen” on the little I could spend, they were Over the Moon-and very thankful! And I was very happy that I was able to give them what they both really wanted! Phew!! 🙂
Post # 5
to be honest sometimes i do agree with the oldies.. cos it can be quite a shock to spend several months salary on photographs even if they are very special photos. i think there is way is a way to balance style and a good budget.
Post # 6
i get that a lot but not so much in that we’re doing too much… but rather too little. My family has a hard time with the DIY concept because at my mom’s wedding everything was done by vendors. You hired a dj, hired a florist, got invites printed, etc etc. Ah well. 🙂
Post # 7
I betcha a nickel that if you said you were just having cake and punch at the fellowship hall, they would have a conniption:) I think some of that is generational too. WWII era people did have simple and quick weddings. Bigger weddings were common in the 50s and early 60s. Smaller again in the 70s and early 80s until Princess Di (God rest her soul) changed that. I think many weddings are scaled back right now, compared to 10 or 15 years ago. I also think that has made brides more creative and many weddings more unique.
Post # 8
I’m sure you’re right; if I actually tried to do cake and punch they would probably wouldn’t be happy. Probably just wishful thinking.
I shudder to think how much weddings will cost in 30 years! I might be in their shoes someday, haha.