(Closed) The Tiniest Budget – and other drama!

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
2819 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

*HUGS* I’m sorry you’re feeling down. If it helps any, you can have an amazing wedding for $5K. As for seeing your fiance more, could you get a service like Skype or iChat or Google video chat to talk face-to-face…it might not help a lot, but it may help some.

Really sorry you’re feeling bad. But it’ll get better, just watch!

Post # 18
Member
1998 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

You can absolutely have a beautiful wedding on a $5,000 budget! It takes some doing, but I have confidence that you’ll be able to pull off a lovely day that you’ll be able to look back on with joy.

Best of luck!

Post # 19
Member
468 posts
Helper bee

as an other PhD bride I feel your pain. Sending you lots of hive hugs! 

Post # 20
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee

*hugs* Oh honey…I feel your pain. 🙁

We have a $5K budget too. My engagement ring was seperate but I told him if he spent over $500 (not $5000) on it, I’d be pissed at him because I am not a jewelry girl and I don’t want to walk around with something I would most likely damage or lose on my finger that cost more than my car.

I don’t know what he spent on the ring but I believe it was under $500 and I’m proud of him. It’s a good sized black diamond set in white gold with black diamond chips up the sides of the band.

Our budget is 5K. Right now, we don’t have even $1 saved towards that yet. We’re hoping to get married in 2 years. We REFUSE to take a loan or use credit for anything. I will not be one of those people.

Our parents are not giving us a dime.

On the plus side, this means our parents have NO SAY in what we do, who we invite or anything else. 😉

Our biggest dillema right now is I want to have a nice wedding & a nice honeymoon. We could do that with a 5K budget if we elope, have a destination wedding w/ just us and then a good honeymoon. If we have a “real” wedding, it’s going to be wicked ghetto which is making me sad. I want to elope. He wants to have a wedding. But we have time. I have 2 years to convince him we should just go to Vegas. 😉

 

 

Post # 21
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I know how you feel…my fiance and I are both in PhD programs at the moment, and trying to plan a wedding while we live in one of the most expensive cities in the country has been VERY FRUSTRATING.  But eventually, all the hard work and all the rough times will come around and you will be stronger and smarter for it! 

Post # 22
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Girl, I COMPLETELY understand how stressed you are.  When we first started looking at locations, facility rental alone started at $5000 (also our entire budget).  That is what led us to having a destination wedding.  We ended up in Punta Cana, but there are a ton of other choices that are affordable.  It took a bit of searching but we found some great all inclusive resorts.  Many of them also have free/cheap wedding packages.  Try looking into Cancun, Bahamas and Jamaica.  If you prefer to stay in the US, you can have a small wedding on the Carolina coasts or a mountain wedding at a cabin in TN.  I’d be happy to help you brainstorm/search for locations if this sounds of any interest to you.  Just send me a message if you’d like!  GOOD LUCK!

Post # 23
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

*hugs!!!*

it’s never easy, especailly when you have a small bugdet. My fiance and I have a small budget too. There are tons of ways to still have a gorgous wedding on a budget. My fiance and I bought a book that was all about a 5k wedding budget and it’s been a big help.

The only part that is really going to sap our budget is the photographer.

Best of luck! and never forget you’ve always got the bees!

Post # 24
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I’ve come to offer you hope.  I was married on June 6th on a $5,000 budget.  My fiance and I were BOTH out of work at the time, and I wanted to postpone the wedding due to lack of money.  Our Priest told us, however, that money should never keep a couple from getting married.  He reminded us that the most simple weddings were the most beautiful.  He said that too much "stuff" takes away from the real reason you are there in the first place.  So, we decided to "go for it".  I got my dress for $100.  We married on the rooftop terrace of our church in downtown Charlotte.  The church is historic and we stood under the belltower with all the skyscrapers surrounding us.  It was beautiful!  The weather was perfect, with blue skys and temperatures in the low 80’s.  The reception was at my sister’s house.  She has a beautiful big house and she agreed to let us have it there.  We bought buckets full of roses at Walmart and decorated the reception ourselves.  Candles and flowers made things seem classy and elegant.  The cake was three tier and cost about $150 dollars.  My husband, who is a chef by hobby, cooked the day before the wedding!  Real gourmet stuff that just had to be warmed up.  We rented tables and linens so there was room for everyone.  It was only about 25 of our closest family and friends.  My son’s best friend took the pictures.  He did a great job.  Everyone keeps saying, "You had the most beautiful wedding!"  And it was.  Mostly because our family was all there and we shared the day… shared our happiness.  It CAN happen for you!  I promise! 

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Post # 25
Member
92 posts
Worker bee

Wow, you need a BIG hug!!

*HUG*

I know how you feel, having been low income myself for years. And like you, I chose that path. There were times when I felt totally miserable and wondered why I didn’t chose a more financially stable path, but at the end of the day, I knew I was doing something I really felt positive for. Money can’t buy that sort of thing and in the end, you can be proud that you stuck to your guns and did what FELT right rather than go out and literally buy into the consumerist culture.

As for a diamond ring, my fiance actually did get me one, but I feel some regret over it. I always said I wanted a ruby ring and now that I’m sporting a diamond one, I feel like I gave up what I truly loved for something socially acceptable. Don’t get me wrong, I love my ring for what it represents, but sometimes I feel down on myself for not having the guts to remain individual. It’s a small thing to worry over since it’s just a piece of jewelry. If you want cheaper alternatives, you can get a white sapphire or white topaz set in sterling silver.

I also wanted to say that I tend to enjoy small, inexpensive weddings way more than the ritzy ones. The more personal and intimate the wedding, the more fun I tend to have. I think it’s because the smaller the budget, the more it’s about the celebration of the couple, and the bigger the budget, the more it’s about LOOK AT ME!

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