Post # 1
So…my cousin’s getting married a month after me. I wasn’t really worried about it, though, until the last week or so.
First of all, I found out she went through about half a dozen dates before picking the month after mine. It wasn’t until after she sent the Save-The-Date Cards that she found out what my weddding date was. And she and her mom were upset and wanted me to change my date because they thought I had just chosen it, and certainly I could change?
Um…no. P and I have been engaged- with the date set- since April of 2007.
Luckily, my uncle remembered the date and not only told them they couldn’t ask me to change, but called the rest of that side of the family to make sure that they didn’t have to pick between the weddings.
I had pushed it out of my mind and moved on, but her invitation came in the mail today. A perfect white letterpress invitation with fancy script and everything. And did I mention she’s having a destination wedding in Florida?
I know I shouldn’t, but I keep thinking of my poor little printable kit invitation and my indoors church wedding. My family’s budget has hit some rough spots, and while we’re still able to pay for the wedding, it’s not exactly what I envisioned.
So how can I calm my highstrung self down and deal with the fact that my cousin’s wedding is going to outshine mine?
Post # 3
Allow me to reminisce … First, a partial list of the things I completely don’t remember about basically every single wedding I’ve ever attended: what their invitations looked like, how fancy their chairs/china/silverware/etc were, how they decorated their venue, the intricate design on their cake, how expensive the dress looked, what food was served, whether they used real or fake flowers.
And now, some of the things I do remember: how blissfully in love the couple looked as they said their vows or during their first dance, whether the couple made me feel welcome (did they make the effort to talk to me, did they looked thrilled that I wanted to celebrate with them, were they good hosts), the fun I had partying with an awesome group of people.
At the end of the day, no amount of money can pay for the sorts of things that are truly memorable.
Post # 4
Aw hunny, don’t compare your wedding to hers! Its hard to do, but you have to remember what the weddings really about. And a lavish wedding doesn’t equate to a wonderful marriage/relationship.
Post # 5
I totally agree with Red here..
People can go to Florida whenever they want.. but its not everyday that your family gets to see you and your FH speak to the world your commitment to each other forever.
Post # 6
I love what redherring wrote, because its true. You only remember, in the end, if it was a happy event filled with love. And that’s all that matters, for real.
PS-if your cousin is as petty as she seems, I’m pretty sure it will be reflected in the way she hosts her wedding and how people see her. For people like that, karma always does the job.
Post # 7
I totally agree with @redherring she’s right. No one will remember the invites or the any specific details they will just remember they had a great time at your wedding! :o)
Post # 8
Aw! Your cousin doesn’t sound like she means to do this to you, it’s just her style, maybe?
Let me second redherring – the best wedding I’ve been to was a sweet affair in the bride’s hometown, with her family doing all of the catering, and I have no idea what the centerpieces or invitations looked like. I DO remember how everyone around them just glowed with happiness at their joy, and how VERY in love they looked. I didn’t even know them that well (distant cousin), but it was just obvious they were so happy!
Post # 9
I wish I had that problem. FI’s brother who started dating his now fiance last year, got engaged after us, and is now getting married a month before us. Also, his cousin is getting married two weeks before us and another of his cousins is getting married 3 weeks after us.
All of these are out of town weddings for Fi and I. One wedding a month later would be wonderful!
In terms of worrying about your wedding compared to hers, don’t. AND if you can’t help yourself and you think theirs will outshine yours because they had far more money to spend, be glad that yours is first and not following shortly after their bug budget blowout.
Post # 10
It totally doesn’t matter how nice the invitations are or how fancy all the details get. All I notice is how happy the couple is while getting married and how much fun everyone is having afterwards. That usually means having everything be convenient (you’ve already got her on that one!), being in a good mood on your wedding day and serving alcohol!
Post # 11
Aww don’t worry about it. One of the worst weddings I’ve ever been to was a wedding where they easily had twice our budget, if not more. It’s how much $$$ you have that makes it great.