Post # 1
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
Hello bees!
I have come here seeking advice. We are having a beautiful baby girl in August and ever since we found out it was a girl we had thought to name her River.
We are both nerds, Dr. Who and Firefly of which there are two female Rivers. Well long story short, the name was not received well with FI family or mom. She has stated that it is a boys name, an ugly name, and that if we name her that she’ll have to come up with her own name to call her by.
That really sucks you know? My mom was the same way but she has slowly come around just wanting a healthy granddaughter, name aside.
Ever since then, my happiness for the name has died and I’ve been looking at other names.
I’m stuck on the name Jane. We could name her Jane River. FI is firmly set on River Serenity. He has mentioned the name, Teagan Nicole, so she would have my name as her middle and the initials TNT.
Only problem is I don’t really care for Teagan. It also has been really hard to find a name that is paired well with his daughters name, Alaura Dannon.
I would like for our daughter to have a name as unique as hers, so that she doesn’t feel plain, but I also don’t want her growing up with her whole family telling her how awful her name is. But with everyone disliking River, I’m at a complete lost as what to do.
Any opinion is appreciated.
Post # 2
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
Keekers: hmm I’m not keen on any of them tbfm, sorry lovely. I’m more into traditional or the more popular names. However I do think this is yours and your SOs decision, and if you love the name river then stick with it.
Like river belle
river victoria
river eve
river amelie
river rose
x
Post # 3
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
Listen, if that’s the name you guys want to name her, then name her River. It’s your daughter, not you IL’s or your mom’s. And set them straight her name is River and they have no business calling her anything else unless it’s like a pet name like “sweetheart”, “honey”, etc. they have no right saying anything. That is the rudest thing IMO. And I think River is a very cute name, and it’s not a boys’ name, it’s either IMO.
When my SIL an BIL were preggo with their daughter and said they wanted to name her Apple, they received a lot if resistance and some even laughing at her, mostly from another SIL who I don’t want to get into her personality, but can be a major bleep sometimes (Lots of times). After our pregnant hormonal SIL left deflated about the teasing, I gave the mean one a piece of my mind about how she treated the preggo one (which I NEVER do). It’s just not right. I don’t like the name Apple at all, but if that’s what they want, it’s none of my business and my SIL received nothing from me but support. The only name we suggested them not usin was when her initials would have been ASS. My SO pointed it out. And they didn’t end up using that middle name anymore.
They ended up using Apple as her middle name but call her both by her middle name and some call her by her first name and she is just confused about her name now.
I also have first hand experience (not to their or your degree) about baby names not wanting to be used. We named our youngest after his dad and call him DJ for short. When my dad first found out what we call him he told me he would never call him that and he would just use his first name, David. Just that little bit of change hurt and all he said he would do was call him by his formal first name. Luckily by the time my dad first met him he used DJ, even though for the first month and half he used David on the phone with me (my dad was out of canada when baby was born and didn’t come to visit until he had to come back to Canada for his normal visit time).
Sorry for the long post lol. Stick to your guns and talk to family about how what they say is hurtful. beinf able to pick your baby’s name without drama is important. When they start putting your picks down, it’s really deflating. Good luck an maybe just keep your picks to yourself until baby makes her first appearance. Then you don’t have to deal with negativity. Good luck and congrats on te baby!
Post # 4
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
diymomma: thank you so much. It’s just difficult seeing as we live with his mom. She won’t have much choice once the baby’s born, but I just tend to be passive, and like you mentioned I don’t want our daughter confused by people calling her different names.
Winterbride_England: thank you for the name suggestions. I dint mind if the name isn’t a person’s cup of tea, it’s just the fact that people have been so openly harsh about it.
Post # 5
Member
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
Honestly… F*ck them. Use River if you love it. They got to name their own kids and should get no say in yours.
When people want to use a unique first name I personally prefer it paired with a classic middle name, and vise versa. I think River sounds especially pretty when combined with a three or more syllable middle name. Some combos I like are:
River Alexandria
River Elizabeth
River Audrianna
River Catherine
River Madeline
River Louisa
Post # 6
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
You know, fuck them! It’s your kid! I would STOP talking to people about your name choices.
My niece is named Stella, and my sister’s in-laws HATED the name while she was pregnant. Told her all the time what a horrible name it was. Well guess what? Her name is Stella and everyone lived. She is SUCH a Stella – it’s the perfect name. And everyone loves it.
Post # 7
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
Thank you guys, I’m feeling a bit better. I just needed some outside opinions. I know it’s our choice and I’m glad my FI has a strong back bone lol. I just have felt like maybe we were giving her a bad name and not realizing it, I mean names are always “to each there own” but I was starting to feel like it was the worst name in the world. But like my FI says if our daughter really hates her name she can always get it changed when she’s older lol
Post # 8
Member
6908 posts
Busy Beekeeper
Jane is simple, classic and elegant. Paired with a very unique middle name like River, it’s the best of your potential combinations.
Post # 9
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
I had a neighour who was ahast – AGHAST! – that her grand-daughter was going to be named “Passion” (the little girl is half-Asian, half-Caucasian so I guess it’s a little Geisha-esque. lol).
She gave her opinion prior to the baby’s birth, but the parents’ stuck with it. She now loves her grandbaby Passion with all her heart. I don’t think she’d care if they’d named her “Mud.” It’s her grand-daughter and that’s all that matters.
River as a name has strength. I like that for a girl. It’s gender neutral anyway. I might be inclined to give an obviously female middle name – to make it clear she’s a girl. River Nicole is nice.
Pick a name you love.
Post # 10
Member
8469 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I voted for River Serenity, but I’m a huge Firefly fan lol.
Post # 11
Member
2484 posts
Buzzing bee
The only River I know is real life is a female, so no, its not a boy name. It’s pretty neutral.
You are never going to please everyone with a name. It’s best just to name your kid what you want and people will get over it.
For what it’s worth, if those were my options, I would choose River Serenity. However, have you considered River Jane? It’s the reverse of Jane River, and for some reason I like that more.
Post # 12
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee
I dont personally like river because when you say it it doesnt seem to flow as either a first or middle, very mouthy. But what about riva? (Said like reeva) It still has a similar sound to river but will flow with just about anything. I was thinking of using it as a middle name: madeline riva.
Oh and if you spend any time in new york you can use the ny accent to say it just like river…. Haha it would be rivuh.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by CGDarcy.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by CGDarcy.
Post # 13
Member
583 posts
Busy bee
Keekers:
“River Serenity” is way too heavy on the Firefly for my tastes as it is referenced in both the first and middle name (and I was a big fan of the show). Don’t name her “River Song” either.
Jane River or Teagan Nichole seem preferable to me. But it is your child at the end of the day.
You could also call her River Jane. River is fine in the first name spot if that’s your preference. Just pick a middle name that’s not from Firefly or Doctor Who…
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This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by plum_pudding.
Post # 14
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
I would hate to have a name like “Jane” when my sister had a cool name like Elaura Dannon.
your mother-in-law needs to STFU about coming up with a different name for your daughter because she doesn’t like River. If that is the baby’s name, that is what she will call her. have your husband tell her that in no uncertain terms and stop worrying about what she thinks.
what about Willow River? Sorsha? Sorry, “Willow” nerd here.
Too bad you’re not having a son because you could totally name him Madmartigan and that would be awesome.
Post # 15
Member
307 posts
Helper bee
River is a beautiful name. I see NOTHING wrong with it at all. How would people even tease a name like that, anyway? It doesn’t rhyme with anything dirty like kids love to use as ammo in school. It doesn’t have a questionable meaning. It’s just…River.
I’ve never seen or heard of a boy named River, but it’s probably unisex.
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