(Closed) They registered for WHAAAAT?! (Registry etiquette question!)

posted 10 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 47
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

You should register for WHATEVER you want.  I would rather buy someone a Wii that they will love and use everyday than a platter or something they’ll use once a month. 

Post # 48
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Just as I think that it is fine to register for camping goods and other non-traditional items, I also do not understand what is wrong with a $98 salt shaker. Or $130 coasters. I think it would be rude of a couple if those are the least expensive items on the registry. But if they have a wide range of prices, why does that matter? Perhaps they entertain a lot? I look forward to having nice dinners once Fiance and I are married and would like to have nice items to use. I don’t feel “entitled” to anything on my registry, they are simply things I like and plan to buy if we don’t receive them as gifts.

I think couples being insensitive about costs to guests by not offering a wide range of price options on their registry is one thing. But otherwise, why judge what a couple has selected?

Post # 49
Member
539 posts
Busy bee

I say register for whatever, all a registry is, is a ‘wish list’, most couples don’t expect to receive all they register for, but it gives options for family and friends to potentially chose from; and also, couples often receive a discount to purchase items they didn’t receive w/ a discount. For us, we own a home together and there isn’t much we need, we will register for a few things we would like an upgrade for, and a few other things we desire, but our main registery is at our local home improvement store for things like fence posts/pickets, and other landscaping items we would enjoy receiving…as we want to landscape our yard more. Many think that is non-traditional, but that is okay, all we want is for family/friends to come celebrate our union, gifts are not needed.

Post # 50
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

LOL, Hopewell! I’ve seen that too. I can’t imagine giving a trash can as a gift. Regardless of how nice it is or the cost. What would you write on the card? “For all the trash you will lovingly create together!” So funny. Maybe they want the completion discount, though?

Post # 51
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@pompom — “register for whatever you damn well please!”

 

I LOVE THAT! HERE HERE!  Us brides go through so much stress planning for a wedding, hell, I deserve a Wii or an Ipod! Who wante to cook in there new pots and pans after all that stress?? Not me! I wanna play mario! hahaha.  ๐Ÿ™‚

 

I can see where some things would draw the line, but electronics are just as much of a staple in a household as other things are these days.

Post # 52
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

The way I feel about registries is this – as long as you have items that cover a range of price points, you can register for whatever you want. A guest doesn’t like it, they don’t have to buy it. The old rules of registries no longer apply. For older or more traditional guests, they might think it’s weird or whatever, but for those people you can have some more traditional items or they can just get a gift card or give a check or whatever they are comfortable doing. I don’t think a wedding guest should judge a couple on their registry items. That’s kind of petty and if I found out someone was legit offended by something I registered for that they are not in any way obligated to buy me, I would reevaluate why that person is a guest in the first place. People who love you don’t judge you for wanting a Wii or some camping equipment.

Post # 53
Member
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I think it is a great idea and I am really happy you posted this thread.  I have been dreading the registry stuff because it seems really boring to only have china, stemware, sheets etc. Not that I am against some of these things, but I am happy to see some more creative options for the registry!

Post # 55
Member
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I agree that you should register for whatever you want. I think the Wii, camera and GPS are totally fine. I do think the binoculars and DVDs are unconventional but I wouldn’t say they’re inappropriate at all.

I’ll admit I think it’s strange when I see hot rollers, DVD’s & video games and Yankee candles on a registry, but like PP’s have said, I just gloss over those items and buy something else.

Post # 56
Member
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t see anything wrong with it either. We actually registered for some movies and Wii games! And, my Fiance decided it would be funny to register for something way out there, so we have toilet bowl cleaner on our registry. Yep, thats right! I guess thats what happens when you have a few drinks before you register! hahaha! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 57
Member
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

“Traditional” registry.  UGH.  This is the second time I’ve seen “tradition” used as a defense to demanding the bride and groom do something.  Let’s evaluate a little bit why there is a “tradition” of buying homewares for the bride and groom:

Traditionally, the bride and groom were NOT living together NOR on their own prior to marriage.  They lived with their parents.  Traditionally the bride and groom were immediately moving into a home together, which required a lot of money, and left them without any money to furnish said house.  They had to buy all the furniture for that house as well.  Therefore, traditionally they registered for home furnishings for their new abode, so that they could live day to day life uninterrupted (like cookware, bakeware, dishes, towels, linens, etc.).  So many brides and grooms who are following the traditional path by living with their parents until they get married probably WILL have a very traditional looking registry.

For the rest of us, this convention makes no sense.  Why request dishes you already have?  Linens?  Appliances?  Cookware?  If you already have it, why would you register for more?  People want to give you gifts for the wedding, which is nice.  But you don’t have to stick with housewares if you’re already comfortable with what you have.  Give people other options for things that you enjoy.  I see nothing wrong with video game consoles or fishing poles.  Even arguing that a registry item is just for “one person and not the other” is kind of weird to me.  I’m sure the couple weighed what would be best for them both, and if that means a fishing rod, then that is what they are asking for and I think it’s very judgemental to tell a couple that they didn’t register “properly” or “correctly.”

Post # 58
Member
4479 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with registering for $100 salt shakers or trash cans, either. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I don’t buy things that aren’t fun for me to give, though, so I probably wouldn’t buy them. But if a couple wants $100 that could have gone to something more useful go to a salt shaker, that’s totally their business. If they want to spend a $100 check that I might give them if there’s nothing on their registry that I want to buy on the salt shaker, they are free to do it. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 59
Member
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I think it is fine.  We registered for all of those things too.  We didn’t receive any of them.  But we were able to use the cash our guests gave us and get 10% off all of those items on our Target registry after the wedding.  And 10% off a DSLR camera is quite a good deal!   So just add whatever you want on your registry, and especially things that will get you 10% off.

Heck, we added $5,000 sterling silverware to our registry.  We didn’t want this at all.  We knew no one would buy it.  We only added it because we got an awesome free gift for doing so.  I’m sure some people who saw our registry were like “what the hell?”  But who cares.  I got a nice free gift out of it, so that made it worth it to me.

Post # 60
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We registered for a Wii AND a Wii Fit.  And you know what?  We got them, and we love them.  I don’t really care if someone saw them on our Amazon registry and was “offended.”  Am I supposed to pretend that I want bajillion dollar crystal wine goblets?  Well, if I am… sorry, friend-o.  Not gonna happen.

Post # 61
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@MightySapphire: EXACTLY!!! I.e., I already have all of the traditional stuff, yo!

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