(Closed) They’re too old for flower girls, but I don’t want any attendants. What to do?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Firstly, I don’t think they are “too old” to be flower girls per se There is no real age limit and if the oldest suggested it, that means she’s okay with being an eleven year old flower girl.  So, Why not just have 3 flower girls and let them sit after they do the tossing? I don’t think this will be too many girls especially since you have no other attendants.  Or, have one of the girls carry the rings in for the ring warming and then carry them back to the officiant after.  I think they might me too young to usher or help with the guest book, and unrolling the aisle runner is not very glamorous lol. Good luck deciding.  Personally, I plan on having no attendants and 4 flower girls 🙂

Post # 4
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2001

I would also just have 3 flower girls.

Post # 5
1542 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Are you doing any kind of special ceremonies withing your ceremony?

In mexican weddings there’s a Lasso ceremony: a large eight shaped loop of cord or rosary beads is placed around the couple’s shoulders. There are Lasso bearers in this case.

If you’re planning a wine box ceremony for instance you cna have one of them to carry the box.

Post # 7
1095 posts
Bumble bee

I’m having 2 flower girls are they will both be 9 at the time of the wedding

Post # 8
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I would go for 3 flower girls.  One of the prettiest (and slightly quirky) weddings I’ve seen had an adult as “flower girl”, she was a ballerina and danced down the aisle and the pictures were incredible.

That might lend some dignity to the position: do the girls dance at all?


Honestly, if one of the girls asked: then I wouldn’t turn her down.

Post # 9
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you want the girls to do something like scattering flower petals, it may be easiest to have the older girls do it. Not sure how well  4 year old would follow directions, but you can have the older girls help her with it.

They could also help with things like passing out bubbles/birdseed, holding your bouquet, the rings, etc.

Post # 10
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I too am having no bm or moh, but two fgs (3&5), and my dad wants me to include my 8yr old soon to be step sister. I really had no desire to, just wanted the other 2 but think I will have to.

I would have her do a reading but she still talks in baby talk frequently and Fiance and I cringe st thst thought so fg it is.

Could they do readings?

Post # 12
4193 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I know you said you wanted them in the ceremony, but what about having them hand out programs, or at the reception, being guest book attendants?

Post # 13
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Could they be usherettes? Have them hand out programs and seat guests. Then they can walk down the aisle before the parents of the bride and groom.

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