(Closed) Thin Brides with Plus Size Grooms

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Equine_Breeder:  I’m thin and Fiance is 6’3″ and built like an offensive tackle…he’s not huge, but definitely a stockier guy. I’ve never had people be so bold to say something like that to me though…that’s just BEYOND RUDE! How does his size mean you’re settling? The people who are telling you this are clearly very shallow, and if they’re willing to judge someone off of their size so easily then they have deeper issues. The issue isn’t your Fiance, it’s their stupidity. 

ETA: Your bosses should not be commenting on things of this nature whatsoever. That’s completely unacceptable and you could probably file a complaint if they continue making remarks like that. 

Post # 4
Member
2553 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Equine_Breeder:  Oh my, those people are real as$h*les! Seriously, who says something like that to you about somebody you are going to marry!?!  Those are not good people. My FH is big (like a football player who doesnt work out and needs to lose a few pounds) and nobdoy ever makes those kind of comments.

 

Post # 5
Member
2553 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Galang_Gyal:  offensive tackle is exactly what I was trying to say!

Post # 6
Member
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@sheepandbear:  Lol, yayyy for offensive tackles! I like guys who are built this way 

Post # 7
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My Fiance is a big boy at 6’3″ and 285 and I am thin…not as thin as I’d like but you know. In the past, some people have made comments about his size and quite frankly, I don’t give a damn anymore. At first, I let it bother me to an extent…but they don’t see him for anything other than his size. Piss on them. My Fiance is the kindest, sweetest, most compassionate person I’ve ever known (besides my Mom, love you Mom!) and the biggest thing–he makes me incredibly happy. Live your life and don’t let anyone get you down. 

Post # 8
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

@Equine_Breeder: 

I hear ya. My Fiance is incredibly self-conscious about his weight — and narrow-minded relatives would openly comment on our pictures together on Facebook that he’s fat. So, anytime I post pictures of us, he gets irritated at me. But I was born in a country where everyone is thinner than Size 0 — for them to see a lanky guy who has some pudge is completely foreign to them. In my home country, they openly criticize your weight like we would casually talk about the weather in North America. I’ve gained considerable weight since moving to North America. So, when people are nice, I hear “You lost weight!” OR if they see me during winter, I get the “You’ve gained weight!” .. but then I would be like.. “Oh, so have you! What have you been eating?” (That usually makes them laugh to shrug off my question)

My inside voice would be like, “To hell with what they think!” I’ve also had judgemental people telling me who I should date.. that I could do better, especially when female acquaintances think my SO should’ve proposed after how many ever years. I can understand their opinion, but since people are often too quick to judge, they won’t know what makes ME happy. So, they are entitled to what they think, but these people don’t love me for being myself, so I won’t give their opinion an ounce of damn. What they say is just “noise”. Tune them out. Do what makes you happy ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
Member
683 posts
Busy bee

@Equine_Breeder:  Same thing here. My boyfriend is overweight but he’s also big everywhere, big arms and everything. But I have this guy I work closely with that has met my boyfriend who says “i hate fat people, they are lazy”. I try to tell him he can’t just say there all lazy and just hate them because he thinks they are. My boyfriend is definitly not lazy, he’s a hard worker, we go on walks and everything. Hes just overweight, which I like because he makes me feel so little ๐Ÿ™‚ and I know he will always protect me! ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve never had people directly say my boyfriend was lazy, or that I could do better. But it still is not nice to talk about how you don’t like fat people when you know my SO is overweight.

And he is diabetic which doesnt help him lose weight. But I hate when people assume he is type 2 diabetic because he is overweight. He has type 1 diabetes that he has had since he was a kid, he didn’t get it from eating to much sugary foods!

Post # 11
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Ehh, my cousin is in the opposite boat. She’s a larger gal and engaged to a twig thin guy (and I say that affectionately, as I too am “twig thin” by our family’s standards, lol). Perhaps it is because we know and love my cousin that her weight has never even been considered in their relationship, but I had some friends over for tea the other night and they saw her STD on my dishwasher (okay, so my fridge is stainless steel… but my dishwasher isn’t!) and they immediately started to make snide comments. I guess when they asked “Who is this?” and I answered “Oh, that’s my cousin” they assumed my cousin was the guy (he’s blonde and blue eyed like me, while my cousin is a brunette and has hazel eyes) and said some really mean things about my cousin’s weight.

I corrected their thinking and told them that my cousin was a wonderful woman and that she and her Fiance are very much in love. They take such good care of each other, and she is a very hard worker. Well one girl said “she has to be, or else he wouldn’t stay with her.”

Oh that made me so mad. She isn’t being nice and working hard because she wants to KEEP HER GUY AROUND, she is working hard because she has a kick ass work ethic and enjoys helping to support her family (it’s just her and her Fiance, but still, family is family).

Fiance is twig thin like me, but if he were to gain weight it wouldn’t change his PERSONALITY! These people making these comments put WAAAY too much emphasis on appearance I think. Yes, SOME obese people have health issues and are lazy. Just as SOME thin people have health issues and are JUST AS FREAKING LAZY – I guess they’ve forgotten that we’re people not cookie cutter copies of everyone else… *sigh*

Whomever you love shouldn’t be a concern of anyone else, and whomever others love shouldn’t be a concern of mine (obvious what-ifs excluded).

Post # 12
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Just wait until he gets a wild hair up his ass and drops major pounds. 

Insert. foot. in. mouth.

ETA: My honey is a full foot taller than me and definitely has a little gut on top of his naturally thick build and I find him incredibly irresistible. It’s so good to hear that you feel the same way about your fella. I was nervous by the title of the post that YOU were the one with the problem. I’m with the other Bees and say screw the nay-sayers! Sounds like they’re jealous of your happiness, if you ask me. Are either of your bosses happily married, by chance?

 

Post # 13
Member
721 posts
Busy bee

I’ve been there, but not with fat comments, which something that’s (IMO) worse because it’s something he’ll never be able to change no matter what.  Short comments.  Tall girl, short guy, god I hear it all the time.  I’m only two inches taller than my SO but I think even worse than the outright mean “oompa loompa” “he must be making bank to bag you” “well at least people don’t think LITTLE of him TEEHEE” comments are the sympathetic “oh…well he must have a wonderful personality.”  And he’s a gorgeous man, incredibly tan body, toned and fit, long thick wavy black hair and dark eyes.  But the stares on the street we get are awful.  

I’ve learned the best way to treat those comments is to immediately shoot something right back about their SO.  “My god your girlfriend is a heffer, are they freebasing gravy at your house?”  That usually gets the point across.

Post # 14
Member
3424 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Dizbee:  best line of the day…freebasing gravy at your house…love it! 

Op, some people are tactless morons that don’t deserve your time. Love really is blind:) 

Post # 15
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Dizbee:  How does calling a completely innocent girl a heffer get your point across?

The topic ‘Thin Brides with Plus Size Grooms’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors