Post # 1
Member
4453 posts
Honey bee
- Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom
My one year wedding anniversary is the end of this month, September 26th to be exact! As nice as married life can be, sometimes I get nostalgic for those early days when we were just ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’. What are some things you miss from those days…just for fun!
For the first year of us dating we didn’t live together, and actually lived in two different cities. Neither of us had a car, and public transit took anywhere from 1 1/2 – 2 hours from one door front to the other (depending on wait times as there were a lot of transfers and no direct route between cities). As much as we didn’t enjoy the commute, the rush of walking up to that ‘other’ front door and seeing the other person made it all worth it. The fact we only saw each other on weekends and MAYBE one day during the week made things like grabbing coffee or taking a walk or going to a movie that much more special.
Another thing I miss is the yardwork. See, I rented a basement apartment with a few roommates in a HUGE old house that had been converted to five apartments total. Each apartment was assigned one ‘task’ that helped keep the house running (ex: apartment one was in charge of making sure the garbage bins made it to the curb on the right day on time, apartment two was in charge of shoveling snow in the winter ETC). Our apartment was in charge of keeping the front and back lawn mowed. There was this old clunky manual push mower in the shed for us to use. My now DH would mow the lawn for us shirtless. Myself, my fellow female roommates, and sometimes even a few tenants from the other apartments would sit and watch him put on a show for us as he cut the grass. Back then he had a warehouse job and was in pretty good shape, and he was one of those guys who doesn’t sweat…he glistens! So he was a nice sight…and I was proud that he was MY nice sight. We live in a condo now…so no yardowrk for us, lol!
How about you?
Post # 2
Member
2511 posts
Sugar bee
We’re anniversary date twins~ Only I got married in 2008!
The only thing I miss is him trying to impress me. We used to go out to such fabulous romantic dinners when we were dating, and he’d go out of his way to surprise me with beautiful jewelry, flowers, or handbags for my birthday and our anniversary… I miss those things! But relationships are ever-evolving and our priorities have shifted more towards things like homeownership and parenthood.
Post # 3
Member
838 posts
Busy bee
I just miss dating! He used to find new places for us to try, and we had a standing weekly trivia date. These dates would also always end with super passionate kisses that don’t happen as often as I’d like them to anymore 😉
Post # 4
Member
2752 posts
Sugar bee
We were semi long distance (about an hour or so away) while I was in college. I would live for Friday’s when I’d come home and we could spend the weekend together. I also miss the waiting stage. I know a lot of women hate it, but I found it thrilling to be at that stage knowing that everything was about to change and just not knowing when.
Post # 5
Member
4042 posts
Honey bee
We dated for 10 years before marriage and have been married for 3 years. I don’t really miss anything about dating because life didn’t change drastically for us. We had lived together for 7 years before getting married too, so it wasn’t much different. I much prefer married life though because of the financial, legal and social benefits that come along with it.
However, thinking way back to when we first started dating though, I loved that he would write me hand written letters once a week. It was generally about his day, what was going on and things he looked forward to doing on the weekend together. I would write him back as well. I still have most of the letters he gave me and it makes me blush when I read them. So I guess I miss that. I asked him if he would start writing letters again and he gave me a very strange look.
Post # 6
Member
614 posts
Busy bee
- Wedding: Embassy suites Hotel
libellules : yes girl! Why does that change? I don’t get it. Now going out to eat is a date… lol
Post # 7
Member
1255 posts
Bumble bee
I think it’s easy to take living together and each other for granted. When we had to meet in the middle of about 30-40 miles apart, it felt so special to have a couple hours or an overnight together. We made time and it was worth the drive even if just for a couple hours together. Made me feel special and loved!
I had to edit this because, sadly, nostalgia made me realize I miss more than I usually think about, and it started to turn resentful. It’s a good reminder for me to think about what he might miss these days, too, though! 🙂
Post # 8
Member
4467 posts
Honey bee
Hun…I don’t mean to de-rail your thread, but please look — truly look — at your marriage. I’m not trying to be mean or target you or anything, but your last post was disturbing and I am genuinely worried about you. That’s all I will say.
Post # 9
Member
219 posts
Helper bee
ljm308 : Thanks for editing. Editing my comment as well now.
I miss the excitement of sleeping over each other’s places. It was always something to look forward to in our earlier stages of dating. It would always be so romantic and fun. Now we just fight over the covers and who is taking up too much of the bed! Lol
Post # 10
Member
1024 posts
Bumble bee
After your last thread, this one makes me so sad to read. 🙁 I too am worried. If you find yourself looking backward and thinking that the past was a better time for your relationship, I think it’s a good idea to take a very hard look at the present. We are all rooting for you and want you to be happy and healthy.
Onto the nostalgia: I loved when my husband would sleep over while we were dating. We were taking it pretty slow at first so nothing serious happened, but I looooved snuggling up close to him and smelling the way he smelled–comforting and spicy and clean. It was just nice having his arms around me and feeling safe and cared for next to him. I still love snuggling up close.
Post # 11
Member
7759 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I didn’t put 2 and 2 together about OP’s posts until the PP pointed it out. It doesn’t really sound like “just for fun.” We can reminisce, but we can never go back exactly to the way things were. In a healthy relationship, looking back is fun, but living for the present and looking towards the future are even better.
When we were just dating, I ran and biked longer distances. Now I’m not out for as long because I want to spend time with DH.
Post # 12
Member
3634 posts
Sugar bee
I miss the adrenaline rush of the beginning… And spending the entire weekend in bed eating and watching Netflix and not having any chores around the house to distract us from each other.
That said- I would never go back. What we have now is literally what I always dreampt of but never thought I would find.
OP- I really hope this is part of you processing that something in this relationship is broken. I wish nothing but the best for you.
Post # 13
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
It was definitely super exciting at the beginning. Long romantic walks to the car and goodnight kisses. I loved how right before we started dating he couldn’t keep his eyes off of me. Strangely though, I don’t miss much from dating. We both didn’t like the fact that we had to go home separately at the end of the day. Now I just get to spend more time with him and no commute needed to see each other!
Post # 14
Member
228 posts
Helper bee
I miss the carelessness we had being young and dumb. Spending ridiculous amount of money on restaurants.
Post # 15
Member
83 posts
Worker bee
- Wedding: June 2016 - Old Lake County Courthouse
Nothing because we still have date nights as a married couple. He is still romantic, thoughtful, and creative with them too.
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