- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2015
I’ve been avoiding telling anyone that I got fired, especially from FH’s family… His great grandma has helped on the bills but FH lied and told her my hours got cut because 2 people on sick leave came back. She has nagged us constantly since I graduated from college about me getting a job, which I apply for jobs EVERY DAY. I’ve only gotten 3 interviews since I graduated in April. I have a proffessional resume, dress proffessional for interviews, everything. I even got rid of my eyebrow piercing and colored my hair a “normal” color to be able to get a job. We only have one car, but I have reliable transportation (The city bus) and while I had that job for two weeks, I walked 1/2 hour to the bus terminal everyday I worked (and I only had 2 days off the whole time)
It’s been a week officially, and I’m still beating myself up. I got the flu and worked in the bakery of a major corporation, and I only worked there for 2 weeks, but I knew the logical thing to do was to not go in. Well, when I went in the next day, they fired me, before I even had a chance to tell them that my FH was getting my drs excuse that day for me, because they were closed on Labor Day. I keep crying and telling FH I’m sorry and it’s my fault we’re struggling with bills again and that I should’ve just went to work even though I was sick (As in, throwing up sick.) They said “They were going to cut their losses now and go ahead and let me go, but I’d be eligible for rehire” (My thoughts? “Eff you, I don’t wanna work for you anymore”. The same manager that fired me was looking for a reason to fire me, They asked me how my first day was and I just said “harder than I thought it was gonna be.” and he went on this whole schpeal about how if I’m gonna get overwhelmed that he’s gonna question if I can do the job. I think he was just an *sshole.) I pick up my last paycheck tomorrow and I don’t know how I’m gonna do it without bawling or wanting to b*tch someone out.
I knew though, as soon as they told me “you’re fired” it meant no more wedding. My parents said they’d give us 5k for the wedding, but it’s effing impossible to have the wedding we want with 5k, and there’s no guarantee that my parents will come through for us, because they are about in the same boat that we are. FH’s dad offered to pay for alcohol, but we’ve had noone else offer to help out other than that. Every single solution I’ve come up for to cut back on costs, my mom has a problem with, and when her and my dad are footing the bill, I feel like I have to listen to them.
I feel horrible because we’re struggling with bills and FH is the one making the phone calls to his dad, his great grandma, asking them if we can borrow money and we’ll pay them back on xx/xx date. His great grandma already helps us with groceries and pays for the car insurance to help us out, and we take her grocery shopping twice a month, but I still feel guilty as h*ll. My exact thoughts everyday are “Hey I was supposed to work today, if I still had a job we wouldn’t be struggling with bills, we would still be able to get married next year, I wouldn’t be bored sitting at home all day applying for jobs online, and I wouldn’t be so p*ssed at myself.” I hated the job and it was a hard job, but we needed the money. Now we’re back to having no money at all. We moved out when I had a job offer in my field when I graduated, and then when I called the salon owner when I graduated, she said she wasn’t hiring anymore, and we already had moved out (We moved out 2 weeks prior to me graduating, the landlord gave us those 2 weeks for free, even though our lease didn’t start til april 1st)
Ugh, I’m sorry for the horribly long vent. I just am so dissapointed in myself and upset and want to cry my eyes out because we decided last night to put off the wedding til we could afford it on our own, with no help from anyone.