(Closed) Things we will never admit outloud, but thinking while TTC….

posted 8 years ago in TTC
Post # 62
Member
641 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

DH and I have been together since we were 15 and got engaged at 19. After a 3.5 year engagement, we were finally able to get married on 10/12/12 (exactly one week in-between our 23rd birthdays). As crazy as it may sound, “baby fever” struck me not long after we got engaged. As the eldest of three children, with two younger brothers ages 19 and 10, I thought for sure I would be the first of us to have kids, but things didn’t exactly happen like that. My 19 year-old brother and his girlfriend welcomed their first daughter, the first grandchild of my parents and great-grandchild of my grandparents, in August.

Trust me, I love my niece with all of my heart, but a part of me really ached inside when she was born. Throughout the pregnancy and up through her birth, I just kept pitying myself. Now that DH and I are married, we are planning to start TTC, but a part of me wonders if the birth of a first grandchild/great-grandchild outshadows the birth of any others following. Sure, everyone would be happy, and of course it would be one of the most memorable and wonderful moments of DH’s and my life, but from my personal experience as a first born, even though there were no “favorites,” I was always reminded that my own birth was considered extra-special to my parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents.

 

Post # 63
Member
1832 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Ohhh I like these kinds of threads! Well between the two of us, DH and I have 22 nieces  and nephews – Yup, 22! We aren’t rabbits I swear! Anyway I just really feel it is our time for a baby!, DH’s brother and his wife conceived and delivered their 6th baby in the time we have been trying for our first and they are talking about more children. They are EXCELLENT parents and support their family on their own, however if they have another baby before us, I swear I will lose my freaking mind!!!!

Post # 64
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@ChuckNorris:  

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@MrsStrawberry24:  

LOL, maybe that is our problem….we need to quit our jobs, apply for aid and get a new iphone!!! They should add those categories into FF ๐Ÿ™‚

I am just petrified that we won’t be able to have any kids, not so much worried about when…I just wish I knew it will happen ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 65
Member
136 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

This thread definately gave me a few good laughs! thank goodness because TTC started out fun and has turned into whats wrong with us sort of thing. if you know what i mean.

We havent used protection in over a year and we really started trying this summer like hardcore. All our friends keep saying when are you going to have a baby? seriously does it have to be discussed at every supper conversation! now i have coworkers asking that and one the other day was like oh then you proly dont want one if it hasnt happened yet! WHAT ! im 25 yes i want a baby and we are trying!!! people can be so insensitive. I wish i could figure out how all these people have accidents and i hate when they talk about their food stamps!! Dont get me wrong im glad tax payers can help them but i wish they would check on them a little better. I seriously counted 10 pregnant friends off the top of my head last night! To make it even better DH and i both have a siblings that have both been trying for atleast a year or two and im worried that if we do get pregnant first or second we will be hated by them or they wont even acknowledge that hey it wasnt a walk in the park for us either and could be happy like we would be for them given their circumstance! I will say DH and I have grown through all of this and for that i am greatful!

Post # 66
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@LuckyOne827:  That’s a good way to look at it! Hopefully it will happen for us when it’s the right time!

Post # 68
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@StaceyA:  

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@LuckyOne827:  

I agree, time to start having fun with it!!!! Any ideas? DH and I were talking about making bets throughout the days (football games, whatever) and loser has to give a backrub or whatnot…good way to start!!

Post # 69
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I am also terrified that my brother’s’ wife will be pregnant before me.  I don’t like her very much and she doesn’t like the family very much either (long drama story lol) anyway is just my brother and me, so i really, really, really want to give my parents their first grandchild.  I hate thinking it, but i can’t help it. 

Post # 70
Member
136 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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@StaceyA:  Glad I’m not the only one feeling this way. I have had some medical issues come up so i keep reassuring myself that theres a reason for everything and while i dont always see it now i will later. Im generally pretty positive but the whole TTC thing has definately weighed me down. Just always was a fear it wouldnt happen and now its like i this turns around. I also tried telling my DH that since we both have twins in the family, maybe we arent getting pregnant right now cuz we will end up with two later! LOL i know i doubt it but ill keep telling myself theres a reason for everything! Hopefully we all get lucky soon!!

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@MrsJuneBee:  Hmm I like your idea! Im very competitive and could always use a back rub and its a good starter! Excellant idea!!

Post # 71
Member
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@MrsJuneBee:  DH and I make bets too!!  We play poker every week and whoever stays in longer/wins gets to pick the position ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 72
Member
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@ChuckNorris:  do we work in the same place? ๐Ÿ™‚  even the children have iphones, nintendos and jordans.  Im all about helping children, but seriously!!!

Post # 73
Member
1413 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

Well, I’m not TTC, but at 39, my thoughts that I am NOT telling anyone are, “Should Fiance and I be trying to conceive?” And “Do I really want a baby right now?” and “If I don’t have it now, maybe I’ll never have it. Am I okay with that? Is he?” And of course, “How are the huskies going to react?”

 

 

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