(Closed) Things you won't discuss in public…

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

All of those topics plus money. I hate talking money with other people. I was raised to believe it is no one’s business but the family. 

Post # 4
Member
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I won’t discuss them at work, but I will over a beer.

Post # 5
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee

I’m more likely to discuss methods of hair removal and compare birth control than I am to discuss politics, ever.

Post # 7
Member
9825 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Irony alert: your avatar is a political statement and a pretty offensive one. you quickly got political in your gun post challenging Australians on their murder rate with NRA talking points. 

Maybe you aren’t as unpolitical as you think you are. You come off as pretty in your face to me, just FYI. 

 

 

 

Post # 8
Member
10509 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

For me it really depends on the situation.  I’ve discussed topics like abortion, but usually it’s something going on in the US so here it isn’t as controversial.

The biggest is probably related to salary or what we have savings.  I’ve still talked about money though, but more about what bank accounts are good, especially with people who are trying to get that stuff set up and they are from another country.

Post # 9
Member
4664 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I don’t bring up stuff like that. Religion, politics, money, medicine, nutrition, parenting… But if someone wants to engage on those topics I will. When it comes to religion… I’ll be the first to admit I don’t respect everyone’s beliefs.

How much I want to make my point depends on how much I care, but even more on who I’m talking to. If I am either very close, or total strangers, I will be much more willing to have a serious debate than if it’s somewhere in the middle, because usually those middle people are either co-workers or in-laws and I’d rather keep the peace than be right in those relationships. 

FH thinks that makes me a little weaker than he is… (he will pretty much verbally battle anyone, anywhere, anytime, if they get under his skin enough about issues) but from my POV I’m always willing to compartmentalize for a debate and am mostly good (not perfect, but decent) at avoiding personal hurt/anger over a policy argument. I never decide I hate someone or they hate me just because of those types of opinons… but I also never assume that other people are the same way.

Some people just can’t cope with being around someone who disagrees with them at all, and I’d rather not take the gamble and have my working life suck or my in-laws hate me just because of an impersonal disagreement.

But with people I am close to and trust? Or people who are mostly strangers? Bring it on.

Post # 11
Member
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Bebealways:  Eaxctly how I feel! While I will only bring up the sensitive topics with the FI and close friends/family, there isn’t a topic that I won’t discuss if someone else brings it up.  I also try to moderate myself depnding on whom I’m speaking to (but then later I rant to FI about it when it is just us).

Honestly I think having completely off limits topics isn’t good for society, we should talk about religion, politics and policies, if we don’t we will never challenge our own beliefs and grow as people.  I have found that the more I talk about complex issues the more my opinion evolves and I think that is healthy. If as a society there were more of talking and listening debate would be less hateful and more productive. Not talking about issues can lead to demonizing those who hold a different view.

Post # 13
Member
6361 posts
Bee Keeper

Hmm I will talk about religion and politics as long as the conversation is respectful.

I especially think that talking about politics is very important: it affects all of us, public pressure is usually necessary for positive change, and many people are very oblivious to much of what it would be good for them to be aware of. The important thing is not to make it into a generic “team blue” vs. “team red” argument. It probably helps that the party I respect most is Green 🙂

I don’t talk about private things in public. Family issues, personal finances, stuff like that.

Post # 14
Member
2651 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Bebealways:  Agree 100% with almost your entire post. The only thing that differs is that FI is the same way I am. 

 

@Tinatiny1:  Yup.

Post # 15
Member
872 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I absolutely refuse to talk about money, never going to happen. I did once and learned my lesson and lost a friend because of it. 

I don’t like talking about politics either it has gotten to the point I won’t even tell people who/what I vote for. 

I agree with not talking about abortions either….That is a recipe for disaster!

As for Religion if someone asks me I will tell them since I have no shame in hiding it, if someone wishes to seek counsel I will try my best to help them and direct them to other people and places that can help. However I have had people ask me my beliefs so they can pick fights with me, and to those people I simply say, “I am what I am, and I believe what I do, I have no interest in “discussing/debating” this with you. I can however give you my Church’s inquiry e-mail and you can have all of your questions and topics answered/discussed there. Or you are more then welcome to come to my church and sit in for a service.” That is as far as I will go discussing Religion. 

Other than that I am pretty much an open book, and will discuss and converse on almost any other matter there is. If that makes me “politically incorrect” ….Eh…I am not here on this Earth to please everyone. I’ll say what I want, and do what I want within legal means. 

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