(Closed) thinking about dropping BM’s

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

How awful…. you know, I only have 3 bridesmaids… and I like it that way.. if you have too many, they start to get catty and rude.   I have one friend that really wanted to be in the wedding and all she talked about was how she was going to look so great at the wedding, she was going to get hair extensions and her teeth bleached and was wondering what color and style the dresses would be so she could start looking for matching make up!! WHAT!!  This may sound rude but the bridesmaids are supposed to be there to help you on your special day. Not make it all about them. Needless to say, she’s not in the wedding. It sounds like they are just like my friend.  It is an HONOR to be in someone’s wedding.  The bride and groom are going to have pictures and memories for the rest of their lives… DON’T have someone bring you down and not be happy for you.. I personally think they do not need to be in the wedding….. they do not sound like they have your best interest at heart.  God Bless You, and Good Luck

Post # 5
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Girl, I was friends with someone for 12 years… we were cheerleaders together in JR. High and High School… Our names were both Stephanie.. so they called us Steph 1 and Steph 2…  I really thought we would be friends forever…  Well about a year after we graduated high school her jelously got worse and worse … I mean over little things….. from grades, to boys, to clothes and makeup…  We just slowly fell apart…  and I think thats OK…. it was better….  You change and become more independent when you get older and it’s normal to change friends and intrests…  She doesn’t have your best intrest at heart and I think deep down she would understand if you told her you didn’t want her in the wedding anymore…  If she didn’t understand now, she will later when she matures a little… 

Post # 7
Member
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

If there are already that many complaints I would say why even deal with and drop it.  Focus on those who do plan to be there for you and who have been supportive.  Don’t dwell on the negative ones, not worth it. 

Post # 8
Member
30 posts
Newbee

I think you should just talk to each one of them and ask them why they’re acting that way. Then, ask them directly – Would you prefer to not be in my wedding? Because if they can’t support you, then what’s the point? Just be direct. Most likely, the whining and complaining is out of jealousy, nothing more. You don’t need all that drama on your wedding day!

Post # 9
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ahhh… I had college friends that were like this. They always b*tched about not having money to follow through on plans, but always seemed to have money for other things. Flakey. A couple are still my best friends and have matured… others kept up w/ this overall suckiness and we’re no longer close.

Maybe your friends are wedding bell jealous, perhaps they have different priorities (aka have fun w/ their money rather than pay for you Bridesmaid or Best Man dress… how much is it for anyway? I’d be honest if I couldn’t afford it, but not all women are comfortable w/ that), perhaps you somehow gave off bridezilla vibes?, or I suppose they just could be horrid flaky friends.

Instead of getting yourself worked up, just confront them each individually and see what it is they have an issue w/… if there is no real issue, then they just suck and you have every right to drop them.

Remember, your # of BMs should not serve as just a status symbol, but those you truly love and want near you for support on the day most important to your relationship!

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