(Closed) This is for anyone that is considering becoming Childfree by Choice.

posted 10 years ago in Married Life
Post # 62
Member
6610 posts
Bee Keeper

@GroovyHippieChick:  I’m hoping I have an epiphany one way or the other. Because I’m indecisive enough as it is. πŸ˜‰

Post # 65
Member
744 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@StealthyBee: Thanks, and I understand completely. It’s such a touchy topic, and it does quite often seem to devolve really quickly.

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@Ms. Flowers:  That’s true. Even without the burden of being a constant entertainer, there’s a crap-ton of other work you have to do. That’s the part that makes me hesitate on wanting kids. Even if DH and I do decide to go for it, we’re pretty set on only going for one. More than one seems like it would be way too much work for me.

Post # 66
Member
6584 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I myself am a “breeder”, but I did want to offer my congratulations to the OP on a big life decision.  Your decision is valid and the flack that you may get from people who choose to confront you about it is appalling.  I hate the judgement. 

 

Post # 67
Member
4590 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@Ms. Flowers:  yeah. that’s why I didn’t even want to go into it. It would just be really nice for us to have our own space on this site, so that we could feel like we could truly had a space to speak without judgment or being bingoed *sigh*

So, what is your Fi doube majoring in? I was thinking about going back for my MBA and possibly Leadership and Organizational behavior, but we can’t afford it,a nd I don’t really see it paying off in the long run

Post # 68
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

@Bubu82:  I’ve always been an on the fence person myself. I get where you’re coming from. I have two small brothers who I love dearly, and there are times when I can picture myself raising kids just as well behaved as they are (the first one especially). But the problem is, you never know who you’re going to wind up with. That bit has always made me nervous.

Post # 69
Member
6610 posts
Bee Keeper

@Ms. Flowers:  Do you mind if I ask how old you are? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. And it’s not that age really matters. I guess I’m just asking because I’m 24, about to be 25, and I’m relieved that I don’t have to make any tough (or maybe not so tough) choices yet, biologically speaking. So I’m just always curious to know at what point a couple makes this decision?

Post # 70
Member
4590 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@Bubu82:  have you told people about your decision to only have one? I find it crazy how much judgment get for that as well! I mean hell, it seems you are damned if you do, damned if you don’t

Post # 71
Member
2933 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Welcome to the club!

I’m so glad there’s more of us… now we can all band together and take care of each other as we get older and don’t have minions to do our bidding for us.  πŸ™‚

(I say that in jest, however I’m currently watching my 59 year old mother be treated like a whipping girl by my grandma, who is 84.  It’s very clear that she had kids so she could be cared for in as life goes on, not to actually enjoy them)

Post # 73
Member
744 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@MrsSl82be:  The only one I’ve told that we want one at most is my mom, and she was pretty cool with it. I think because I’ve always said, “I don’t want any” ever since I was a kid myself, she was kind of like, well, one is better than none. I think she did, however, take that as “they are definitely going to have one kid,” which is NOT what I meant. We’re still deciding. Fortunately she already has two other grandkids, so she doesn’t really push it too hard.

I don’t get why people get so judgy at the idea of just one – only kids turn out just fine. My DH is one, and he’s pretty cool. You are right, though. People will judge no matter what you do.

ETA: OP, I apologize if I threadjacked here. Back to the topic at hand!

Post # 74
Member
1851 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

We’re on the fence. I appreciate posts like these because I feel like there aren’t enough of these to help the rest of us decide.

Post # 76
Member
6610 posts
Bee Keeper

@beekiss:  Same here! Hearing others’ experiences is really helpful.

The topic ‘This is for anyone that is considering becoming Childfree by Choice.’ is closed to new replies.

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