(Closed) This is our wedding not your college rager…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@XWeddBlissX: I am SO with you! I think it is so rude of a guest to ask if it’s open bar. What is it with people who can’t go 4 hours without a drink!?

Post # 4
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Yes! Our caterer actually told us most people will be hanging out at the bar all night. In my head I’m thinking…yes all 100 people (who are mostly family) are going to be hanging out at the bar ALL night?? Umm I was under the impression they’d be there to celebrate our day with us, they’re not coming to get smashed!

Post # 5
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

There was some tail gating at my wedding… just sayin’

Post # 6
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@SapphireSun: LOL!! Sometimes you gotta love family and friends for their charm.

Post # 7
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@MissBabeski: I may or may not have joined them….

Just long enough to be like…. hey, party’s over here, but I’m cool and fun, and NOT bridezilla about this.

Post # 9
Member
659 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

if you’re having bartenders, make sure they know that you are NOT ok with them serving drunk (or even almost drunk) people.  Tell them if people seem to be coming back too often, to cut them off for a while. 

It’s the bartender’s responsibility. Also, if you’re having a caterer, your contract might say ‘no alcohol not brought by us/served by us’ or something, so maybe explain that to your guests you’re worried about?

 

Post # 11
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

omg. ours is more: “this is our wedding, not your family reunion”

we have distant relatives (i’m talking like very distant) wondering why they “can’t come party it up with us” <- yes, that’s a direct quote. i haven’t seen these people in yearrrrs, but all of a sudden they want to come to my “party” <- not my wedding, my party.

grr.

Post # 13
Member
1893 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I feel you.  Neither Fiance nor myself are heavy drinkers and generally get annoyed if we’re surrounded by falling down drunken idiots.  Yet another reason why we’re not having an open bar (we’re providing beer and wine, the rest is on them.)  Our wedding is also on a Sunday evening so hopefully people will be less inclined to get totally shitfaced.

Post # 14
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Maybe I’m in the minority but I want all of my guests to go all out.  Our package includes an open bar and we’re paying per person.  I jokingly say that we want our venue to lose money on this wedding.  However, while my group of friends and family are drinkers, I’m lucky that not once has anyone ever gotten out of hand.  Obviously, I hope this doesn’t change next year.

Post # 15
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@XWeddBlissX: exactly! it’s like if they were genuinly happy for us and really wanted to witness us becoming one, then yes, please join us. but unfotunately a lot of them see it as free food and free booze. i’d really just like for them to respect us and how special this day is for us. arg.

Post # 16
Member
852 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I think the reason people are asking could just be so they are prepared: if they plan to drink as part of the celebration and it is not an open bar, they will have to budget. Times are tight, and I know a lot of people who set aside “x” amount of money for events, including weddings.

But yes, if you know those are people who are doing it just for the free drinks, that is tacky – just saying not everyone who asks is like that.

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