Post # 1
I can’t believe I am even writing this. I sent a few photos of myself in my wedding dress to my parents, who live across the country. Their response “you look like you are showing”. Showing = being pregnant. I am NOT pregnant. I am very sensitive about the fact that I tend put on weight around my middle (while most women gain in the hips and thighs). I think it is just the shadows from the ceiling lights making the little “paunch” look worse, but it hurt to have my parents make a comment like that, especially when I am only a month and a half’ish away from my wedding. In the photo, I was not wearing shapewear.
I work out. I eat healthy. I’m a healty size 6/8. That said, I have my vices with my own body. Everyone wants something to be different. But I just can’t believe my own parents, the ones who are supposed to gush about how nice you look. said I look pregnant.
Maybe I am just a little emotional right now. My mother said I was being “overdramatic” when I got upset. Then she had the gall to say “well, you got your shapewear yesterday, so you should be fine”. Thanks Mom. Really.
Just needed some reassurance that I won’t look gross on my wedding day, becuase right now all I can do is look at those pictures and cry…
Post # 3
Aw, I’m so sorry! What an awful thing to say! I’d be upset, too. Can you post pictures here?
I just want to add a little support – moms say mean things. Mine has always been the same way with me and calls my arms fat all the time. It’s been a really sore spot for me ever since. So I understand how much it hurts!
Post # 4
You are not fat and you will look gorgeous in your dress!!! You already have a healthy lifestyle so just keep on doing what you are doing. I am sorry that your parents are saying things like that to you.
Post # 5
OMG it will be FINE. Your parents were totally insensitive. I’m also a person who ALWAYS carries weight around the middle– it sucks! I’m sure the pic you sent them was just bad angle/bad lighting/whatever. I think that a bad photo is ALWAYS worse than the reality. You are going to be moving around and people won’t have a snapshot of the 1 second you’re in bad light or whatever! And your pictures will be fab because your photogs would never let that happen with the lights 🙂
Post # 6
Your mom sounds just like my mom! But, I’m one of those people who appreciates knowing the truth. I’d rather KNOW ahead of time so I can fix it!
Shapewear to the rescue!!! Is it just the style of the dress, though? Maybe your mom just isn’t “hip” if it’s the dress style? Chances are it just wasn’t a flattering photo.
She’s not saying you looked gross, just that it wasn’t a flattering picture. Everyone has their insecurities…don’t worry about it. You’ll be fine on the big day.
Post # 7
thats just plain mean!
just be you and dont let it get you down.
Post # 8
I am a pretty heathy weight but also gain weight in my middle and because of my bad posture a woman asked me this weekend when I was due! I am trying to work on my posture and make my core muscles stronger. That’s unfortunate that your parents commented on your weight. We all seem to have photos tryuing on our dresses where we are tired and not looking our best. I’m sure on your wedding day you will look beautiful in your dress.
Post # 9
Here is a photo – I am not secretly fishing for complements here, just posting becuase people asked. You can see what I mean about the lights though.
Post # 10
Oh man. I know where you’re coming from. I carry weight in my tummy area and OMG when I’m premenstrual bloated I legit look pregnant. Also, my mom tends to make insensitive comments about my weight. That’s really awful she did that, especially pics in your wedding dress! I know it’s hard but try not to let it get to you. I’m sure I’ll still have a little gut action when it comes time for my dress fittings because that’s just the way my body is and I’ve got to just accept that and deal with it via shapewear. It doesn’t mean that you’re fat or that you’re going to look terrible! It just means that that’s your body type, like it is mine. We gotta work with what we have, you know? Try not to sweat it. If you feel really really bad then just hit the gym and try to eat healthier and you’ll probably feel better. There’s so much pressure to look perfect that sometimes I forget that my Fiance is marrying me because he loves me for me so when I’m feeling bad about my body I have to try to remember that. It’s hard though. Why are moms SO obnoxious sometimes? Grr.
Post # 11
Photo didn’t post:( I bet you look great though and I’m sorry your mom was insensitive.
Post # 12
Ugh, didn’t work, hold on:
Post # 13
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
Oh my goodness, you look AMAZING in that dress! Not big at all – I can’t believe your mom said that to you!
I know exactly what you mean about gaining weight in your tummy – I gain weight exactly the same way..it’s annoying! But just know that you look incredibly beautiful in that dress. Not even close to pregnant looking 🙂
Post # 14
Oh I’m so sorry. I don’t understand why parents (and especially mothers) can be so insensitive. It’s like they think they can say whatever they want and it doesn’t matter because you are family and will love them. Um, no. That’s not how it works. Your description of yourself and your lifestyle sounds like you take good care of yourself and I’m sure you look fantastic!
Post # 15
Thanks for all the responses so fast! I guess you know, you sometimes have second thoughts about your dress, and when my parents made that comment, it just brought all those stupid “pre-wedding fears” to the front. Not even necessarily about the “paunch” but about my wedding in general. I just want to marry Mr. Valhalla surrounded by loving friends and family. Everything else (decorations, food, etc…) is jsut secondary.
Post # 16
You look great! Try not to let what your parents said bother you! You and your dress look awesome~! Best of luck!!