Post # 1
It is about one of my sisters, that I love to death. She’s getting married next year too and our mother refuses to go to the wedding if her FI’s dad is there.
There is a backstory here: my sister backed into her FI’s jeep one day, he told her no big deal, and our parents offered to get it fixed. Well his dad went all crazy threatening my mom that he was going to sue her if they didn’t pay for it right away. So my parents turned it over to insurance and said screw you. That’s the short version.
So now my mom says she won’t go if he is there and would prefer they have two weddings. BUT she’s not going to pay for it. My sister and her guy don’t have much money so this isn’t possible.
My mom, for some reason, isn’t very supportive of the whole wedding thing for anyone. She’s been married to my dad for 30 years. I know when I told her I was engaged she was like oh, really… then silence. I couldn’t even get her to go look at dresses with me. Ugh… stupid mom.
Post # 3
WOW! Ouch! I’m really sorry that your mom is like that. I’m no therapist but I’m willing to bet that her reluctance and non-support like attitude have to do with one of two things…1. She is having serious empty-nest syndrome, “my baby is getting married and she’s leaving me, etc…or 2. She is having a hard problem stepping aside and seeing that this wedding (yours as well) is not about her and what she wants and being stubborn is her way of showing she isn’t happy. With that being said, it doesn’t mean she won’t come around…my aunt refused to go to her daughters wedding if her daughter’s step mom was to be there. Long story short her brother and sisters gave her a talking to and durring the rehersal dinner she even went to step mom and hugged her and appologized for hating her…it was wonderful and now they are good friends…not saying that is what will or will not happen but moms have a funny way of coming through sometimes…hang in there and be there for your sister no matter what…
Post # 4
Thank you for your story. I was talking to my older sister (I have three sisters)today about this and we seem to agree that, although our mom says she won’t come, our dad will make her and if he is difficult his mom (our grandmother) will put her foot down.
I’m hoping it will work out. Other than this my mom and the one sister are very close.