(Closed) Thought wedding planning was supposed to be joyous….

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

First: Deep breath!

Now, have your fiance speak to your Mother-In-Law to try to get her to take it down a notch. Don’t make a huge thing about it, but let her know that you’re feeling very stressed about the wedding planning and you need a little breathing room.

As for people that are upset that they’re not invited, simply explain to them what you explained to us. You don’t have a budget to invite extended family members, though if you did, you would have happily invited them. Don’t argue after that and don’t let them make you feel bad for having your wedding the way it suits you and your fiance.

I hope things start to get easier for you soon. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee

Weddings bring out the ugly in some people- it is shocking! Just keep pressing on, your day is almost here~

Post # 5
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Yes, I had a lot of snarky comments too – from my mother!  My mom and I are really close, so it bothered me a lot that she kept telling me that my choices were wrong or that I shouldn’t do certain things.  It took 3 or 4 uncomfortable confrontations about what was bothering her and why the negative attitude before she finally put a lid on it.  Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
12955 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Between some inappropriate comments and your stress level, I can see how it’s causing you some trouble.  Deep breath, relax, and remember why you’re doing all this: marrying your FI!

In regards to your Future Mother-In-Law…I doubt she was trying to “bark orders” at you.  It sounds like the typical comments when someone is opening lots of presents, like “Mine next!” “Open this one!” and stuff.  Of course I wasn’t there, and the tone could have been mean, but it seems to me like she was very excited, you were upset about the attendance, and things got miscommunicated.

The cousin of your cousin is kind of ridiculous.  Unless you’re super close to this girl, she’s way out of line.

Post # 7
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I remember people always telling me before I was engaged “weddings bring out the worst in people…” and now we’ve all seen it for ourselves ๐Ÿ™‚ If I could go back in time, I think I would have put my foot down a lot earlier in the planning process. You sound like you’re a nice person and, if I had to guess, most people are just taking advantage of that. I’m always envious of people who “don’t take crap” from anyone – but people respect that, and they don’t give them any crap…just try and remember that this truly is about you and your fiance, no one else. It’s so difficult to remember that sometimes and all the rude comments can get to be too much. It is IMPOSSIBLE to satisty everyone. If you invited the entire world, someone would still complain. Soon your day will be here and it will be wonderful and when it’s over, you won’t have to worry about this anymore ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

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