(Closed) thoughts on expensive dresses

posted 4 years ago in Dress
Post # 16
Member
1322 posts
Bumble bee

I was prepared to spend up to $3k on my dress, even tried on a Lazaro that was $7k when I was playing dress up, but ended up falling in love with a dress that retailed for $1250 and got it for cheaper. 

Idk if I can give a definite answer, but my thing is is that I will always spend the least I can as long as I am getting quality. I LOVE my dress, and if it was a $3k dress I would’ve paid that price for it. 

The upper limit is always what I can afford, which at the time was $3k. 

Post # 18
Member
3470 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

jmj1021:  Well, I know there way maybe 2-3 people at my whole wedding who would even know who any of those designers were, but I doubt any of them could tell with a casual look if it was a designer dress or off the rack.  

I paid $700 for my dress and anotehr $300 for alterations – honestly, it’s the only wedding expense I have any reservations on (even now, years later).  I wish I hasn’t spent so much; I wish I had gone to Macy’s/Nortstrums/Bloomingdales and found a dress there; I had the time, but my sister convinced me I needed to do the whole bridal shop thing, and I ended up buying a dress that wasn’t anything like what I wanted and paying a small fortune to have it altered to be the dress of my dreams.  

Mostly, I hated dress shopping, so I just wanted to be done with it.  I went to one shop and spend less than an hour before I made my decision.  I wish I had done the whole thing differently.  

Post # 21
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I guess I have no room to really comment on this because my dress and veil were $2200, not including alterations. I would have NEVER spent more than that though. I couldn’t see spending 5-10k on a dress. I think it’s kind of relative. I fell in love with my dress and was willing to pay for it. My mom was willing too because it meant that it was done and over with (lol I might have freaked out and obsesses a little and she was over it)

I wish I could have spent less than $1000 but it just didn’t work out that way.

Post # 22
Member
3470 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

have any of you ever been asked to see your wedding pictures randomly?

Nope, not once – no one has ever asked to see any photos from our wedding, and we don’t have any displayed anywhere (besides what was added to FB right after the event) 

Does anyone really appreciate your wedding the way you do?

Again, nope – it was MY special day, and I loved every minute of it, but to everyone else it was just a fun saturday.  Occasionally, when talk of weddings comes up with people who were there they’ll comment about what a fun/good wedding we had, but it wasn’t anything “special” to them

I constantly go back and forth between being the “it’s only one day” and the “it’s your only one day to be a bride” type person. Anyone else feel my pain?

This was me ALL OVER! I used to work as an event planner, so I’d see a lot of brides go over the top (my sister spent over $70k on their wedding, and it took them almost 7 yrs to finish paying it off) and I’ve seen brides do the court house thing.  Both have their pros and cons, and ultimately, we settled for something in the middle.  We spend about $12k on our wedding, and when I realize that we only spent $18k on the downpayment for our house, I feel like an idiot for spending that much.  But then, when I look at the pictures and remember the fun we had, I’m glad we did the wedding we had.  All in all, my dress budget was my only “regret” if you will, and that was largely because it wasn’t an overall positive experience for me emotionally, not just financially.  I think if I had enjoyed it more, I wouldn’t have minded what I spent.  

Post # 23
Member
2180 posts
Buzzing bee

I don’t think I could stomach paying almost as much for a dress as, say, food for the wedding or the venue itself. I’m planning on just getting a bridesmaid dress in ivory–the less I spend on my dress, the more I can spend on bartending, the photographer, etc. But I totally get that The Dress is a top priority for a lot of brides and can be a once-in-a-lifetime purchase for a once-in-a-lifetime event.

Post # 24
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

 

jmj1021:  used I have seen anywhere from 4000-10 000 

Post # 25
Member
9339 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I want to spend max $500 on my dress (and will be actively hunting to find something that’ll work for much less, even). As long as it flatters me and looks good in pics, awesome. I don’t think I need to spend thousands on a dress to accomplish those things.

But you know, people have different priorities — and if it’s worth it to them, great. It’s just not worth it to me.

Post # 26
Member
4891 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

jmj1021:  I wanted to spend less than $1K on my dress, and I did ($880)… and I LOVED my dress. However, I know that MANY people would never even know how much the dress cost unless they had already been searching wedding dresses and happened to remember coming across the one you’re wearing (or what someone else is wearing). Without asking friends, I’ve TRIED to search for their dresses and no luck. There are so many out there.

If someone has the money to spend on a dress, good for them. I think my <$1K dress looked awesome!

It’s like with anything (clothes, purses, etc)… only YOU know how much you spent on it.

Post # 27
Member
9339 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Kacie209:  Haha, we should totally design an app like Shazam but for wedding dresses. You can take a pic and it tells you what designer/style it is.

Post # 29
Member
1272 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve seen dresses I’ve liked that were ridiculously expensive, but I know I wouldn’t be able to justify the expense of them, to either myself or my SO. Besides, for one day my limit is 1k on a dress.

Post # 30
Member
1295 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I spent $450 (on sale) plus $60 for alterations and $65 for a pettocoat and belt I have already worn numerous times again. I did fall in love with a designer dress than was moe than twice that, but was not willing to spend that much. The dress I ended up getting was super similar to the designer one and everyone thought my dress was custom, so it all worked out. I am also planning on dyeing my dress black to wear again (it’s tea length) which will cost something, but in the end make the usefulness of the dress increase. Spendining 10G on a dress blows my mind, but then I don’t make enough $ to reasonably spend that. While I do appreciate fashion, at some point you are paying for a name plus the quality of fabric and craftmasnhip, so I would probably go custom with a less known designer who’s stye I loved if I had unlimited funds, since I am a bargian hunter at heart. I tend to be willing to spend more $ on useful things, like kitchen applicances, where quality does matter. I felt beautiful in my wedding dress and it photographed beautifully, so it did it’s job. If I get a $20 hand mixer and it breaks while I am making cookies, it did not do it’s job, and I maybe should have gotten a better one or a stand mixer if I make a lot of cookies. 

To answer some of your other questions, 

Some people have asjed to see our wedding pictures since we just were married in June, so it comes up. I’m pretty sure no one appreciates our wedding the way we did, since it was for us and we did a lot of DIY for it. I am also super into event planning, and help plan multiple events a year for a non-profit and for my business. So I feel like unless someone is an event planner, they really don’t understand how much went into the planning, which is just the way thigns re.  However, a lot of the guests did mention that it was a cool wedding and did really reflect us. 

 

For the “it’s only one day thing” we kind of went in the middle as well. Since Dh and I know so many people, we opted to have a small family and close friends wedding (around 58 people). That allowed us to be able to afford our dream venue and still have a reasonable budget (I think we came in around 10,000-12,000.) We did thow in a few “uneeded extras” like a menu card and a photobooth we built, but the DIY helped with saving and getting exactly what we wanted. We are also remodleking our kitchen, so comparing more expesive wine or booze to something for the kitchen we will use every day also helped keep things in perspective. 
I would honestly spend more for a quality photographer than a super expensive gown. You will have the photos forever and you don’t need a high end gown to look beautiful. The designer gowns are pretty amazing though!

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