(Closed) Thoughts on letting a baby cry it out

posted 5 months ago in Babies
Post # 2
6173 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

Letting a baby cry for a few minutes while you take a sanity shower is different than the traditional “cry it out” where the babies cry it out until they are exhausted and stop. I agree with your dr that if you are feeling extremely overwhelmed, take a mental break! The babies will be fine left to cry for a few minutes. I would never leave them to cry for longer than 5-10 mins though. 

Post # 3
1249 posts
Bumble bee

My first baby I was totally against cry it out, my second baby I put mental health first. If your baby is safe and in the crib and you need break let them cry it out while you gather yourself. In your case though, I probably would’ve taken the babies in the shower with me. I’m sure it’s harder with twins but if they have baby bath seats I’m sure it would work.  My babies loved cobathing. 

Post # 4
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2020

I was advised one minute per month of age and used it pretty successfully (ie. at 6 months old, you wait 6 minutes, 12 months/12 minutes). Not so sure how well this would work with twins sleeping in the same room though.

Post # 5
47431 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

There is a huge difference between “letting a baby cry it out” where they are sobbing until they are so worked up they can’t settle, and “letting them fuss for a few minutes” while you take a shower.

As long as you ensure they are safe where they are, they will be fine and life will go on.

Post # 6
1249 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
@bcaggee:  I was advised this with toddlers/ kids in timeouts as well.

Post # 7
7812 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

I agree that a sanity break of a few minutes is different from letting an infant cry until they believe no one will respond to their needs every night. The former is sometimes a necessity; the latter is unacceptable (at least for me and my family).

Post # 9
753 posts
Busy bee

I don’t know how long you shower for- personally I put my baby down for  5 minutes in a safe space and take that shower or pee or whatever so that then I better parent her when I come back. You can become incredibly quick at showering.

I wouldn’t go having a 20min shower or bath etc. Except cobathing but don’t know if that is possible with twins. 

And as other posters have said make sure they’re fed and clean as a first priority. 

Cry it out is a whole other concept and one I don’t believe in. You need to look up the difference.

Post # 10
829 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
@helpluv11:  we don’t do CIO, but when I was home alone in those early days and need to use the bathroom I’d leave him in his bassinet for a minute to do my business and rush back out but I couldn’t do the same for a shower, peeing is essential while a shower can wait

BUT I strongly believe that if you’re at your wits end it will surely be better to put babies down fed and changed while we take a minute to ourselves, some babies are more difficult than others so it’s not for me to judge what another mom does as long as her kids are taken care of

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