- 6 years ago
- Wedding: March 2012
I need to apologize in advance, this is VERY LONG.
I’ve posted about this Bridesmaid or Best Man (let’s call her S) a few times over the course of my planning process since last year… she has been nothing but a nightmare. Starting from complaining about the colour of the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress not suiting her skin tone to complaining about my idea of an ideal bachelorette being too boring, on top of only contacted me within the year for ask if i will buy our wedding bands from her dad (he’s a jeweler).
We had a girls-day out aka bachelorette this past Saturday. We went for a pole dancing workshop, in which she tried for about 15 minutes out of the 2 hours then complained that she can’t do it, and continued to kept herself busy on her phone while the rest of us are having fun. When we got to the hotel where we were having our afternoon high tea, she was ON THE PHONE until we tried to get her off the phone.
I had a change of heart and decided to asked one of my friends (who i always wanted her to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man but did not think she would be able to handle it considering she just had a baby last Aug). We had an extra dress (from one of my other friend who is expecting and will not be able to be BM) but it is too small for the new Bridesmaid or Best Man, so we asked S to try the smaller dress on as she is the skinniest of all and would require the least alteration (so we can give the new BM S’s dress as it is bigger). She was unwilling and said why does she have to try when she already has one that fits her.
On top of all of these, she was pouting and appeared upset the entire day. She did not participate in anything.
When we went to the seamtress together yesterday, she, again, appeared upset and unwilling to help. I tried to ask nicely if she would be willing to find a dress that is more to her taste as she does not like the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress anyways. This way my new Bridesmaid or Best Man can have her dress. In a way, I was already trying to unbridesmaid her, maybe she didn’t get the point.
After we finally found a seamtress that would alter the dress, she called my Maid/Matron of Honor and told her what I said to her. So I called her and asked her if she’s upset at me and what’s wrong. She just said she’s sad about her current relationship issues and hence appeared unhappy throughout the bachelorette. She also continued to say that she wishes she could be getting married soon, but she’s not.
I have been more than accommodating about all the complains and tried to brush it off and be the bigger person, but i honestly don’t want someone to be upset and pouting at my wedding. I want to think she’s happy for me in her heart but unfornately i don’t think that’s the case. However, i feel very childish if i just uninvite her. It’s like I’m stuck in a abusive relationship and always want to give her chances.
What would you do if you were me?