(Closed) Threesome question

posted 4 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 31
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

jholliday1988:  have you ever heard of the “guys we fucked” podcast? (It’s not as dirty as it sounds) there are I think 2 episodes where one of the girls talks about having a three way with her boyfriend, and their fantasys to watch eachother with someone else. I recommend you find those episodes and listen to her talk through it. They did it in a very non judgmental and safe way and she talks about what works and what didn’t..

Post # 32
Member
401 posts
Helper bee

I’ve gone into detail about this in another thread, but the short version is that yes, I’ve done it multiple times, both a foursome (me and my Boyfriend or Best Friend, a friend and her BF) and with another girl and guy a couple of times. I’ve never experienced awkwardness or weirdness afterwards. I think a lot of it has to do with the mindset you go into it with.

And my Fiance and I want to have a threesome at some point, just haven’t found the right situation/person.

Post # 34
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

I’ve been debating on posting…so I made an anon account to give you my true perspective, after participating in this lifestyle for several years.

Set boundaries.there may be certain things that you’re not ok with your partner doing with otherpeople. Maybe like more intimate things like making out or 1-on-1 texting.

Do NOT do this with a friend or someone that has easy access to your personal and professional life. I don’t think i really need to explain this in great detail. There are tons of online sites and advice about how to look for people and vet people and find the right person to do this with. trust me. Do not do it with a friend.

You have to have complete trust in your partnerbut more importantly you have to trust YOURSELF.

When I started participating in this lifestyle with my now husband we were pretty young and followed a lot of the rules that i told you about. My husband sounds like yours and fantasized about me with another man and i always wanted to try DP so it worked out for us i guess. After a few months of trying to find the right person my (now) husband found a guy that he thought I’d like and put me in contact with him. 

Eventually we met up and our first 3 some was amazing. Everything we both had hoped for. There was instant chemistry with the other guy. Since it was so easy we started hanging out with him more and more and experimenting with different things (adding girls, going to sex clubs, etc). We also met other people in the community and participated with other couples. We also got too drunk with some of our very close friends and had 4 somes with them (2 diff couples). Luckily it didn’t get weird with either couple afterwards and we are all still friends (even tho both couples are no longer together). All in all it was really fun until the original guy we started messing around with and I got too close. i think maybe the whole thing got to my head and i was just like letting my sexuality take over. Long story short – he and I started up a side thing. 

So my advice is that you don’t make it a serious thing with 1 person all the time. I’m not the type of person to cheat – at all!! this was before we got married. but since i had done it with him it was easy to just slip up and meet up and have sex whenever we wanted. i totally regret it all now, completely. but this is a real life account of it being a super slippery slope. if we had been engaged i dont think we would have started experimenting. we were pretty young and just acting out our fantasies at the time without really thinking about our futures together though.

Post # 35
Member
2797 posts
Sugar bee

No one thought that OP with no prior post history and this being first post, is a pervert reading responses and jerking off in front of computer screen? 

Post # 36
Member
20 posts
Newbee

Hubby and I, starting before we were married, have only done swaps with two different couples who are friends. I was jealous at first seeing my husband with another woman, but now I enjoy it.  It happens not all that often, but we have become pretty casual about it with these two other couples and have done threesomes (both kinds) where either one of us joins them or one of them joins us.

 

Setting up and doing it may have become casual, but it makes sex between hubby and me crazy intense for about a week afterwards.

 

P.S. I disagree with those who say there’s no going back.  If it doesn’t work, talk about it, adjust, move on.  Hubby and I have had bad experiences with restaurants, vacations but have gotten over them.  You’re more in danger of missing out in life.

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