(Closed) Time between engagements….

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I would never be upset with a friend that had a milestone/major life event close to one of my own. It doesn’t take anything away from her and you can’t put your own life on hold to save her potentially hurt feelings. And like others have said, if she’s a true friend then she’ll either be incredibly happy for you. OR she’ll know that she should be, so she’ll fake it till she makes it. 🙂

Post # 17
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I got engaged a few weeks after my friend got engaged and without talking about it to each other at all, our wedding is a month after their wedding!  We’re both incredibly excited for each other and enjoy having a friend to talk about weddings with without worrying about boring the other person.  Our styles are pretty similar so I was worried about any problems caused by that but it’s actually been nice to have someone on the same page as me.  We’ve also been going through old photos and sending them to each other for each other’s weddings!  Both of us are even having destination weddings of sorts.  They’re getting married in a different state because they went to grad school together there and we’re getting married in a different country because it’s where I met my fiance and where we live now.  I feel like this experience has brought us closer together!

Post # 18
Member
779 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I dont understand women who feel upstaged by another friend’s engagement. I doubt your friend would worry about it. I can see people getting upset about weddings being too close to one another especially if there is a lot of guest overlap and travel is required – but otherwise I would be super thrilled for a friend, especially one I knew was waiting a long time 🙂 no worries

Post # 19
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
jesais:  I can relate!  I posted several weeks ago asking for opinions on whether I should wait for my friend to get engaged.  One of my good friends and I were looking at rings the same time.  She told me NYE that they had picked one and ordered it.  A week or two later, I finally decided on my ring setting and SO ordered mine.  I started stressing out about whether we should wait to get engaged until after my friend did because I knew they had ordered a ring first.  Girls can be drama queens, so I didn’t want my friend to feel like I “stole her thunder” by getting engaged first.  The overwhelming response from everyone who commented on my post was that my relationship should be about my SO and ME, on OUR time frame and what felt right for US.  Not to worry about her and that if she was a true friend she would be happy for me, etc, etc.  Turns out I didn’t have anything to worry about.  She ended up getting engaged the weekend before me (I just got engaged this past Saturday!!!).  All of our friends were out this weekend celebrating a birthday when I broke the news.  My engaged friend couldn’t have been happier for me.  She said she couldn’t wait for us to start the planning process together.  If this is your best friend, she’ll know how long you’ve been waiting and will be nothing but happy for you.  Good luck and congrats in advance!!

Post # 20
Member
6308 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

Get engaged when it works for you; there’s no thunder to steal.

Post # 21
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I’m definitely of the mind that brides get one day. I’m at the age where a ton of people my age are getting married, so every year there’s a big wave of engagements and weddings. And that’s fine–that’s just how life is. 

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