(Closed) Time between weddings

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Appropriate Time between weddings
    1 week : (5 votes)
    18 %
    2-3 weeks : (6 votes)
    21 %
    A month out : (10 votes)
    36 %
    2-3 months : (7 votes)
    25 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    878 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Personally, I wouldn’t have a problem.  But I’m not like that.

    BUT there are tonnes of posts on here from brides who are distraught that someone close to them has come in and made decided to have wedding a few weeks before theirs.  I think you would probably cause a huge stir if you did.  Maybe talk to the other bride about it, to judge how she would feel….but I would not do it.

    Post # 4
    Member
    878 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    And if it just has to be the same month, then think really long and hard about making it after

    Post # 5
    Member
    7606 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I think 3 weeks is fine, but like the PP said, there are a lot of people who will be upset if you “swoop in” and go before them.  If you think your friends might have that reaction and they’re feelings are very important to you, then maybe talk to them first.  On the other hand, it’s their day, not their month.  If you’ve always pictured your wedding in that month and they’ve booked at the end of it, I figure it’s tough cookies for them.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1252 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    It depends how close of a friend. If the weddings are only 2-3 weeks apart its very likely that the couple getting married first will not be able to attend the second wedding or will have to cut their honeymoon short. If they are close friends I’d suggest you run it by them before deciding. A friendship is more valuable than a date.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2731 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I had a situation like this when trying to pick a wedding date. My best friend and her Fiance picked October 2013 for their date, which is the month that I reeeeeaaaaallly had my heart set on before I got engaged. But she set her date first and I didn’t want any hard feelings to arise between us over something as silly as a wedding date. So I picked another date I liked that’s about 4 months later. I don’t think you have to pick one quite as far away as 4 months, but I think the closest to her date I would have picked would be like 2 months or so. It completely depends on the friend though. She could be totally laid back and not care at all, or her feelings might be hurt if you pick one just a couple weeks from her’s. I’d talk to her about it.

    Post # 8
    Member
    63 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I say pick the day that you want. When I got engaged, my sister who at the time was not yet engaged told me that I wasn’t allowed to get married in February because that’s when she was planning on getting married ( sans-ring of course!) I stuck to my guns, and picked the day in FEBRUARY that worked best for us. She got engaged 5 months later, and is now getting married in April. I think be courteous to your friend if she is a good friend, and both plan on attending each others weddings. If it was the other way around, would you be upset if her wedding was 1-2-3 weeks after yours?   If you try and accomodate other people all the time, I don’t think your going to end up as happy as you could be. Do things for you and your Fiance, stand your ground and most importantly do what feels right, Im sure everything will come together in the end 🙂 Happy Planning!

     

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    1351 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Yeah, I wouldn’t do that but that’s just me. If you have to do what you have to do (FI getting deployed, mom sick in hospital etc) then by all means. If you had your heart set on a date that happens to be hers- I’d talk to her about it and feel it out. But, even still I think it’ll cause some hard feelings, and a huge stir.

    I have a friend who is always stealing my thunder. I never make a big fuss about it-because she would say I’m being silly as it somehow just always works out that way… The latest thing is my wedding is coming up and all she talks about at the bm luncheons is hoping to get pregnant, and that’s not fair to me. TALK ABOUT MY DAY DAMMIT is all I want to scream sometimes. But, I digress.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1458 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    One of my BMs is getting married in early August, and I wouldn’t have planned mine before mid-late September so we had enough time between, but that’s just me. I think she appreciates a full 2 months between our weddings! 

    Post # 11
    Member
    2442 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    Another thing to consider is if you have mutual friends that would need to take time off, travel, etc. That could be too expensive and/or getting the time off may not be doable for them.  They may not be able to attend both weddings forcing them to choose one wedding over another.    

    The topic ‘Time between weddings’ is closed to new replies.

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