(Closed) Time for a new ring? (a little long sorry!)

posted 7 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@libby328: Maybe come to a compromise and just upgrade the stone?

Post # 4
Member
590 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - St. Philip Catholic Church/Arcadia Brewing Co.

Or maybe you could get an enhancer for the band? Or use the stone and band to be made into anouther band?

Post # 5
Member
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

what does the ring look like? could it be a right-hand ring? if not, would your husband get you a right-hand ring instead? or just a very nice anniversary band?

Post # 7
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

you are not crazy to feel this way– you like what you like, and you have placed a lot of sentimental value on your ring. 

you mentioned he comes from money and values his appearance to the outside world. I noticed that with some guys, a small ring on the wife’s hand is hard on his ego- some guys have to “keep up with the jonses”. 

like @bookworm88: suggested– maybe let him buy you a new ring and then wear the old one on your right hand?  

or have the old one turned into a necklace? I think a cluster would make a beautiful pendant. 

OR ask him to buy you fabulous earrings or necklace instead of a new ring?

Post # 8
Member
2031 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

First off, I’m dying to see the ring you love because I just love all jewelry Smile

Second, I think you and your husband need to REALLY talk about WHY you love this ring (it’s sentimental, it reminds you of the day you brought your baby home, etc.) and explain that you just can’t part with it.  If he INSISTS on buying you a new bigger model, ask if you could wear the new one on your right hand?  Or maybe make the new ring a blingy eternity band you can wear with your original?  If he is hell-bent on buying you a new big diamond, and you have the financial resources to do it without hurting yourselves or going into debt, I say go for it as long as you get to keep the original ring as a keepsake…it sounds like spoiling you would make him really happy (which is just the cutest thing ever).   

Post # 9
Member
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

maybe you need an eternity band to go with it??

What about upgrading to a bigger moissanite? That way you’ll have a bigger stone for him to show off and a lower cost?

Post # 10
Member
3482 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think he needs to get it into his head that you love your ring as is and its sentimental value is far more important than having an upgraded version your husband considers “worthy” of you. Can’t he just buy you some other extravagant piece of jewelry and take you on a date night somewhere fancy to show it off?

Post # 11
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Can your family afford it?  If you can, let him buy you the ring but let him know you will continue to wear the ring you love  and will only wear the other ring on special occassions.  It sounds like this is really important to him. 

Alternatively, tell him that you love the ring you have, and would prefer he buy a loose diamond for each of your children to put away for them.  Or as other bees have mentioned, let him buy you some other jewelry.

I am totally like you–I tend to be pretty frugal.  But my Fiance loves to buy jewelry, and came from a family that was very into conspicuous consumption and the message sent by jewelry, clothing, cars, etc.  He feels like an expensive ring signals to others that a woman is “worth it” and it devestates him he can’t buy me the world.  Of course, this is ridiculous on so many levels, but it makes sense on an emotional level as this is how he feels. 

We compromised by picking out a budget engagement ring (that isn’t an engagement ring really at all), with the idea that in the future when we can truly afford it he gets to surprise me with a ring he picks out on the budget he wants (around 4-10k).  Instead, we are saving for a house and kids. 

Maybe this was the understanding your husband had. If you can really afford it (and don’t need the money for a house, college funds, retirement, savings, etc.) I say talk to him about why he wants to do it and what he is envisioning, and see if there is a way you can both agree on a plan. 

 

Post # 14
Member
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@libby328: yes! go to paris!!! 

Post # 15
Member
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@libby328: Maybe compromise and let him get you a Right Hand Ring! The one you wear now (which, by the way, is beautiful) has so much meaning and is sentimental to you. I can see why you’d never want to take it off.

If you don’t want to drop a ton of cash on a ring, or if you don’t want another diamond, or even if you want something of quality with a lot of bling…I strongly recommend looking into moissanite. You’ll get the same look and more sparkle without the hefty price tag or questionable ethics.

There are a zillion threads on here on moissanite rings, and I’m not sure I’ve seen a bride unhappy with moissanite.

P.S. Your hubby sounds like a sweetie.

Post # 16
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@libby328: That’s perfect!  Have him take you on vacation instead!

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