Post # 17

Member
407 posts
Helper bee
- Wedding: April 2014 - Morton Arboretum
I think if you give them programs then they will know when the ceremony starts. They will know to just hang out. I mean what is the rush. You are commiting yourself for the evening, right? Personally I know that people can be late. With my venue in particular, it takes a bit to drive through the Arboretum, park and walk to the venue. Also Ceremony and Reception are all in one place so not gap inbetween.
But I understand if come people may want to get the show on the road. And can understand the frustration for all of the early birds.
I think just like with anything else, work what you think is best for your friends and family.
Post # 18

Member
1007 posts
Bumble bee
@futuremrsfitz18: +1! If the invitation said that the ceremony started at 7pm, I would be there at 6.45pm. I would then be in a very bad mood by the time the ceremony started if it didn’t start until 7.30pm!
Post # 19

Member
1007 posts
Bumble bee
Perhaps say “please arrive by 7.15pm for a 7.30pm start”?
Post # 20

Member
317 posts
Helper bee
@emmanneliza: My ceremony begins at 4:30pm and I noted the time on my invites as 4pm. The banquet manager at my venue recommended noting a half hour earlier as well. I would trust the banquet manager and note 7pm on the invitations just make sure that your venue has a “welcome” station set up with beverages and treats for your guests as well as ample seating/lounge space so that your guests feel relaxed and welcome.
Post # 21

Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
Put the exact start time. To do anything else, is good for the latecomers, but rude to the guests who do the right thing and arrive in time to get seated before the ceremony starts. If your invitation said 7.15 I would arrive at 7.00 to 7.05, and I’d be pretty annoyed at having to sit and wait half an hour.
Post # 22

Member
1832 posts
Buzzing bee
People who show up on time (15 min early) for a wedding aren’t early birds, they are on time! It is dreadfully rude to ask the overwhelming majority of your guests who are on time to wait an extra half hour for a handful of stragglers. I still think the banquet manager’s advice was terrible.
If I show up at 3:45 for your 4 pm wedding and you don’t start until 4:30 I will think you didn’t manage your wedding very well and ran late. DH and I both have bad backs – his is far, far worse than mine. Asking him to sit in a hard pew or chair for an extra 30 minutes is very painful. He has a hard time lasting through a reception – please don’t increase his discomfort over bad advice and irresponsible people who can’t show up on time. He spends most his time at an event like that on his feet because it is so uncomfortable to sit.
Cater to your guests who were kind enough to be on time and screw the rest.
Post # 23

Member
407 posts
Helper bee
- Wedding: April 2014 - Morton Arboretum
Like I said, you know your family best. If you think a half hour is too much for them to wait, then put 7:15pm. If you think they won’t care they are spending the entire night with you anyway, then put 7pm.
If you are really worried about it you can put guest arrival 7pm and ceremony to commence at 7:30pm.
I don’t feel it is rude at all.