Post # 1
K, here is the scenario:
Because of a very long story, we have ended up at a church that is neither of our denominations to get married. The church we were getting married at was downtown, so they charged an exorbatant amount of money to get married there. We were now moved to a church outside of downtown and the price is the same. $2000!!!!!
This is not our church, this price includes the minister, a “day of coordinator” for the church, the organist & the rehersal dinner. What I really need to know, is since we are paying a HUGE amount of money to the church, do we still need to tip them?
I’m not sure what the right thing to do is?
Post # 3
Sorry, not the rehersal DINNER, just an hour for the rehersal itself.
I’m confused.. I don’t feel like with that price tag I should have to tip, but I don’t want to offend.
Post # 4
Omgosh that crazy money! I heard that its the best man’s job to tip the church
Post # 5
First of all, I think that its a crazy amount to pay for a church. But unfortunately, you knew the price when you booked it, so I do think that you still need to tip. Would you have tipped if the church had cost 100?? So I think that the rule of tipping still applies whatever the amount you agree to. However, it is your choice as to how much to tip. Hope that helps.
p.s. I heard that it is the best man’s job to pass along the tip to the church, but I believe it is still the bride/groom’s job to tip.
Post # 6
We did know the price, but that was for a church that is downtown… where we were going to have our downtown wedding.. we are now 20 minutes into the suburbs.. where prices for churches are much lower… They merged with a smaller church, but they are keeping the old price from the other place.
There is more drama.. they moved our wedding to this other church, without our knowing it… luckily I called them to check on it.. then when they did move it, another girl had our time slot, and they weren’t going to ask her to move her wedding…so I would have been put out twice..
All these things make me think that the 2000 is enough – I might have tipped on the 2000 at the other church, but now I’m not “feeling the love” for them as much anymore… hence part of the confusion.
Post # 7
is there anyway to back out? You can always say that your price agreement is for the church at another location, since they changed the location on you, the price should also change, and for them to change yet again, that’s not right. There must be another one that is more reasonable both in price and in how they treat you.
Post # 8
Unfortch, we are 3 months out, and this is actually our THIRD church.. the story is long, but we had to change churches 9 mo. out too. So at this point, we are done.. plus the invites are already printing..
We are okay with the 2000, and for that price, everyone working is getting paid – organist will get paid, minister will get paid & church lady will get paid… then the rest i guess they consider a donation to the church.. so I have a hard time, with all that’s gone on, giving them extra… I guess I could ask for a break down of how much everyone gets.. then if I feel that say, the musician gets a raw deal, I could give him a little extra…. dunno.
Thanks for all your suggestions guys!
Post # 9
I actually did not know tipping was necessary for the church. My church has yet to give me a fee. The priest asked that we establish ourselves as parishioners and donate to the collection but has not mentioned fees and I didn’T know how to broach the topic.
Personally, in your situation, I would not tip the church. I would consider tipping the organist if he/does a good job as a tank you but that’s about it.
Post # 10
You don’t tip institutions anyway: tips are for individuals to recognize personal service. And, properly speaking, you don’t tip professionals or the proprietors of businses either — since they are responsible for setting their own fees you can expect that they are charging a fair rate and you wouldn’t want to imply either that they are incompetent at that aspect of their business, or that they are a mere employee.
You could — but only if you actually do receive valuable *personal* service — tip the minister, the coordinator, or the organist as *individuals*. But I’d do that after I found out what kind of service they provide.