Unless you are well off financially and have the resources, I don’t think you can have it all.
I work 50 hours a week at home and my partner works about 60 hours out of the house. We have two kids ages 5 and 11 months. For me I prioritize my fiancé, kids, career, cooking healthy meals and having a clean house (im a little insulted at the wasted life comment), but my social life, and my self care haven’t been at the top of the list at the moment. Travel isn’t a huge priority for me but we do try to do a family trip and a couple’s trip once a year even if it’s only a few hours away.
I’m starting to make myself a priority again because when I don’t, I find I don’t have the energy for other aspects of my life. I used to go to the gym 3-6 days a week but it was tough working so much while having a young one to take care of. So I’ve made a game plan, with the help from family, and I’m going to get back into it and in the spring I’m going to join organised sports to socialize more.
What works for me is routine routine routine. I would say that I do 90% of the cooking and household chores during the day so we can have quality family time after work.
Every day I have a to-do chore like dusting, sweeping, moping, cleaning the bathrooms, etc., and I spread it over the week so I’m not overwhelmed. I make a lot of crock pot meals and meals that I can freeze. Making soup is my favourite because I can make large batches and they are relatively easy and cheap.
When my son comes home from school I try to spend quality time with him so I do something with him that he likes. It’s usually playing hockey. He is also in a hockey league so 1-3 days are dedicated to that. I plan dates just with him so he gets one on one time. My little guy is young and I’m home with him all day so I feel like I already spend quality time with him. I do plan on joining swimming with him soon though. My fiance and I have recently started to try to make each other a priority again since we have been so busy, and plan date nights or even just send the kids out for the night for alone time.
Even though I don’t have it all, and sometimes I’m spread pretty thin, im happy with my life and I’m working on making more me time. You’ll have to prioritize what you and your partner want in life and figure out a way to make it work. But it’s a little unrealistic to think you can have it all. Well unless you can afford a chef, housekeeper, nanny, etc.