Post # 1
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
I feel like I have the sex appeal of Steve from Blue’s Clues. Sometimes when SO and I are about to have sex, he’ll ask me to dance for him…but then there’s no music! So I’m just standing there kinda dancing awkwardly. He always jokes and says I’m so silly, I’ve actually heard from multiple exes that I would be “the worst stripper ever”.
The other night I saw some go-go dancers and even though they weren’t all that gorgeous, they were really SEXY and obviously knew it. I just want to be sexy, and I want to KNOW that I’m sexy. I’m not a bad looking girl and I have a good body, but I feel so goofy every time I try to do anything sexy.
Did anyone else overcome this? Every time I try to “booty shake” or do anything sexy in front of SO, I feel like a joke.
Post # 3
Member
4770 posts
Honey bee
lol I think I may be some stiff competition for worst stripper ever. Darling Husband tells me i’m a comedy act and not sexy, well stop asking me to dance then!!!
Post # 4
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
@Atalanta: LOL ok I’m not alone! I obviously wouldn’t want to be an actual stripper but I would love to feel like one, when I’m getting sexy. Even though I like my body, I still feel very goofy if I’m dancing. Then, if I try to be sexy, SO laughs!
Post # 5
Member
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
Why don’t you take some pole dancing excercise classes? Or belly dancing?
Post # 6
Member
8041 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
@embarrassed99: Oh geez, join the club. I have no rhythm. I am a horrible dancer and I feel so awkward trying to be sexy.
With that said, I am pretty sure we’re perfectly good at being accidentally sexy. You know, we’re just unaware that we’re actually goddesses 😉
Post # 7
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
@FortiesFlare: Well those things cost money…but I have tried out some sexy dance videos on YouTube and I feel goofy even dancing to those ON MY OWN! lol I’m such a failure
Post # 8
Member
5271 posts
Bee Keeper
You should take a sensual dance class/ chair dance class – I went to just one and learned some pretty cool moves. I am a good dancer but when my husband asks me to do something, I go blank – thats why these classes are cool because if you come up with a routine you will feel more comfortable.
If you can’t go to a class, there are videos on youtube – you can look at the instructor who I took a class from (its actually a work out class called zensual dance) even though you are working out her videos are HOT! And you can learn some cool moves.
Post # 9
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
@canarydiamond: Well I know SO loves my body and he thinks I’m pretty because he compliments me a lot…but for once when I dance for him I want him to be enticed and not giggling. I can actually booty shake pretty well, but whenever I do it, he just starts to laugh!
Post # 10
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
Hmm, I would feel super weird if my husband ever asked me to dance for him. Reminds me of the scene in True Lies where the wife has to dance all sexy and she has no idea what she’s doing.
My advice? Take some dancing lessons. Or turn on music. Make him get up and dance on him. I don’t know. I would be terrible.
Post # 11
Member
503 posts
Busy bee
I’ve long since accepted that I am only sexy when I don’t try… If I try, it usually turns into a joke very quickly.
Post # 12
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
@embarrassed99: Take a pole dancing class! or a hip hop or any kind of dance class. I know it might sound tacky, but it is really a fun class and not nasty or tacky at all. My Maid/Matron of Honor is taking us all to a pole dancing class for my bachorlette party.
If you learn to dance in a room with alot of people (you have to remember that even though they are in the room with you they are not looking), you will become more confidant and feel sexy.
Also when there is no music, stop what you are doing go grab the radio or ipod and start the music. It will help you stay confidant and not feel awkward. Listen to the music and loose yourself in it, instead of thinking oh I hope this looks right.
The only reason he wants you to dance is to see your body, and see all of your curves and to admire it, so as long as you move slowly swaying from side to side, he is not going to notice your insecurity. 🙂 I hope this helps!
Post # 13
Member
5956 posts
Bee Keeper
@embarrassed99: Maybe dancing isn’t your sexy thing….maybe it’s something else. Confidence is what makes a person sexy, you do what makes you feel like a powerful, beautiful, sexual being and tell your SO the next time he wants to see you dance that he’s going to have to pay you for it, cause that ain’t your job!
Post # 14
Member
139 posts
Blushing bee
@embarrassed99: lol 🙂 i would suggest yoga. it makes you limber, balanced and grounded. yoga will teach you to learn and love the way your body moves. you’ll gain lots of confidance and i think it might help you move better in front of your guy. 🙂 if you can’t afford to go to a studio (even though its sooo worth the money) try http://www.yogaglo.com. it’s free your first month — after that its $15/month. try the vinyasa style classes (they are more flowy/dance like). good luck!
Post # 16
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
posting to follow up on this, I have the same problem! I’d like to read the responses. it’s always a big joke to DH lol
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