- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
Okie dokie, here’s the sitch! I’ve asked 3 girls to be bridesmaids (my cousin, brother’s soon to be fiancee, and best friend from middle school) and i have one girl who tried to call dibs on Maid/Matron of Honor (details here). FH wants to ask 5 people to stand up for him. he said he would pick between 2 in order to have 4 but i told him he should ask them all if he wants.
we have a mutual friend (more mine than his) who i thought would be a good option as a speaker, but she could easily be a Bridesmaid or Best Man (she’s flying in from Singapore so I want to make sure she has a special part no matter what).
FH is also asking my brother to stand up for him and he himself has 2 (step)sisters… sorry if this starts to get confusing! FH’s sisters are about 15 years older than me (mid 30s I think) and their children are all going to be either ring bearers or flowergir… people. FH said that I don’t in any way need to feel obligated to ask them to be bridesmaids, and that they don’t expect to be, but he’s a guy so i take that with a grain of salt. i’m close with one of his sisters but not as much the other one but i’m not going to open up a can of worms and only ask one! I don’t know what their feelings are on it, if they secretly do expect it, or maybe it’s just an undue burden since their kids will be in it, or maybe even easier so they can watch them (flowergirl will be 3 years old)??
the Maid/Matron of Honor wannabee dibs-calling girl has started messaging me on facebook after like 4 months of silence post-ditching me, talking about how she can’t wait to start planning and what i’ve done so far as if all’s normal (she’s so flakey by nature that she probably didn’t realize she blew me off to begin with). oh, and she told me that her hubby wants me to move my wedding date because it’s his birthday but she’d still “drag his ass to the wedding”. uhhh… sweet. this is the girl who told me not to have it too far away so that they can get drunk. I’ve answered her questions but made no reference to planning with her. I still just feel kind of resentful toward her (whether it’s valid or not) for having the gaul to think she has a right to be my Maid/Matron of Honor when we’ve only seen each other once this year – she has closer friends now and so do I.
I don’t really know what to do. there’s a few options that i’d appreciate your input on, but if you suggest something else, i’m open to it!