My SO is 36, and I’m 31. When we met, we were both already skeptical of the “love, marriage, baby carriage” thing being the typical and expected progression.
We knew within a few months of meeting that we would get married. It was a natural and overwhelmingly mutual decision. The proposal will be coming before the end of this year, and we’re planning on getting married in late 2020.
The more we experience together, the more we know we don’t want children.
We’re both very career-focused, and we find our jobs rewarding. Even so, when we get home, we need and enjoy our unwind time. Neither of us would be willing to sacrifice our career, and neither of us believe in the idea of having a child only to stick him or her in daycare during their very important formative years. We also know that our dogs are already plenty to deal with when we get home. We don’t need a human baby to soak up our energy.
On top of that, we love to experience new things and travel. We watch the families in airports, at hotels, even in grocery stores and malls. We don’t want that life. We don’t want everything to be about the pooping, screaming, constantly needy child pulling at our hands. It won’t matter if it’s ours. We’re not that naive. We like doing our own, very adult, thing.
I don’t relate to children. My SO is much better at it, but I don’t like make believe, dress up, or loud noises. I wasn’t good at being a child even when I was a child. None of the other children related well to me, and I don’t think I’d be good at fostering childlike wonder in a kid. I make a much better adult and interact much better with adults.
When we retire, we’re going to have huge nest eggs. (Yep… Here it is: the money factor.) I like spending my hard earned money on things that bring me joy. For some people, that’s their kids. For me, it will be a vacation home.
I don’t buy into the whole thing of “but who will take care of you when you’re old?” , even if I had kids, I wouldn’t want them changing my damn depends. I’d pay someone to do it anyway. Also, there is no guarantee that your relationship with your children will be good. There are too many variables.
We enjoy the heck out of our nieces and nephews. They’re sweet kids. Then we give them back when they’re not sweet kids. It’s a good system.
Anyway, those are just a few of my very many thoughts on why kids are no bueno for my lifestyle with my SO.