(Closed) To change last name or not? Hyphen? Opinions needed!!!

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1939 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think if you’ve branded yourself as you have with your name, MFOX, I would legally keep my maiden name. I was attached to my maiden name, but I hadn’t branded anything yet and honestly my husband’s last name is shorter and MUCH easier to pronounce. Your name is pretty darn awesome. I would legally keep it, but you of course can have your friends and family know you as Mrs. Porter. :]

Post # 3
Member
1619 posts
Bumble bee

Well you don’t have to make a decision right this minute.  You can change your name at any time.  But it sounds like you really like your last name and want to keep it.  Add in that your Fiance is supportive of whatever decision you make, I say keep your last name and if in the future you have a change of heart, change it then.

Post # 4
Member
2268 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I’m keeping my last name too. I’m making it a second middle name. I couldn’t shake the feeling of dropping it completely, and hypenating wasn’t a thing for me. This way my initials stay in order too.. EDCB.

Post # 6
Hostess
4584 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

 

mfox89:  I’m in the same boat as you.  I’m an attorney, so all of my degrees are in my name, my professional reputation is this name, etc.  I also am admittedly a Daddy’s Girl and feel very strange about not having my last name anymore. 

I don’t personally like the hyphen, but I was pretty set on including both last names somehow.  I thought about adding it as a second middle name (common in the south where my Fiance is from) or having a double barrelled last name.  These options aren’t available in every state, but are where I live.  I was really set on the double barrelled name until I started saying it out loud – it’s a mouthful and each of our last names are only two syllables!  We recently adopted a puppy and I “gave” him the double barrelled name to get used to it.  I also gave my name as the double barrelled at the vets since there was already someone with my full name there, and saying it is so annoying.  “I’d like to make an appointment for my puppy?”  “What’s the last name?”  “Mylastname Hislastname, no hypen.”  Every time.  Plus everyone always hears my last name completely wrong (a rhyming name) so I usually have to spell it all as well. 

Fiance is also kind of clueless about these things, so he wants me to be First Middle Hislast Mylast instead of First Middle Mylast Hislast because he thinks his should go first 😛  He’s also thrown out the option of taking on both, so we’ll see.  Basically I’m saying I have no clue either, but I understand your struggle!

Post # 7
Member
1619 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
mfox89:  No it wouldn’t be weird.  You need to do what is most comfortable for you.  If that means waiting and seeing (even if it takes years) then so be it.  If others think it is weird then that is their problem to deal with.

And if you do change your name, just because you did so legally doesn’t mean that you can’t go by your maiden name professionally.

Post # 8
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I had a hard time with the name change thing too. I really like my last name and its not very common, so I decided to keep it and add his name to the end.  

FirstName MiddleName MaidenName HisName

So now I have two last names and I can use them both or individually, one for work and one socially.

 

Post # 9
Member
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

If I were you I would keep your name, he keeps his name, and if you acquire children along the way, hyphenate their last names.

Post # 10
Member
986 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

View original reply
mfox89:  I changed my last name and now I’m struggling with the change, but neither of us were willing to hyphen. My maiden name is a big part of who I am and we’re a very close-nit family who was taught to be proud of that name. I’m to the point now where I’m considering changing my middle name to my maiden name, while keeping DH’s last name. Could this be a possibility for you? If you don’t have a problem with hyphenating(and don’t want to change your middle name), I say go that route though, that way you both get a keep your name. 

Post # 13
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

I think about this all the time! I will be Dr. Maiden professionally, but will do the maiden middle and use his last name legally. I like the idea of us having the same last name without having to change my branding, website, etc. I love the idea of hyphenating, but think maiden middle is easier in the long run. Farewell to my beautiful middle name.

Post # 14
Hostess
4584 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

He definitely is confusing! I think he just wants his name to go first 😉 Silly fiance!

Post # 15
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
mfox89:  I don’t believe in taking a man’s name (call me a feminist, lol)… so I will hyphenate!  Everyone’s different and to be honest there’s nothing wrong with either.  I think Fox-Porter sounds lovely… I knew a couple where the girl had the last name Murphy and the guy’s last name was Brown and she opted to hyphenate, creating the last name Murphy-Brown lol! 😛 

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