(Closed) To Decline Money for the Wedding?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should I accept financial help for the wedding?
    Accept the offer as is : (16 votes)
    94 %
    Offer a compromise that costs less : (1 votes)
    6 %
    Decline the offer as graciously as possible : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5889 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2012

    i would just graciously accept, and maybe just secretly save up enough to cover the cost in case something comes up later down the line.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2858 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011 - Bartram's Garden

    I think you should let them pay if they’re offering. They wouldn’t offer if they couldn’t afford it – right? And your mom should be happy that someone else is offering to help since she can’t.

    Post # 5
    Member
    6661 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I agree wtih Dandelphia – I would accept and assume she is able to afford it if offering. Obviously do your best to choose an inexpensive option, and there is no reason your Mom has to know. My parents still don’t know how much DH’s parents paid for.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I would accept it. If she offered to pay, let her. Maybe try to get a dollar amount from her, instead of “alcoholic drinks,” so you’ll be sure to stay within her budget.

    I was in a similar situation: At first, my parents weren’t going to be able to help at all. And Future Mother-In-Law offered to help a lot (pay for food, drinks and flowers), and we accepted. Though for a while, FMIL wouldn’t tell us exactly how much she had to work with, so I couldn’t plan anything because I didn’t know my budget. It was very frustrating. Anyway, I think my parents were sad that they weren’t able to help out, but I think they would have felt worse if I turned down Future Mother-In-Law just to avoid hurting my parents feelings. (Does that make sense?)

    As it turns out, my parents are able to help here and there, which is really awesome. And the large mount of money FMIL was going to give us is actually FH’s inheritance anyway, so it wasn’t money out of her pocket to begin with (and we decided to use it on our honeymoon instead). She’s contributing a little more (out of her own pocket), so what she’s contributing and what my parents are contributing will probably end up being close to equal. Funny how things turn out.

    (I hope that made sense– it was a confusing situation for a while.)

    The topic ‘To Decline Money for the Wedding?’ is closed to new replies.

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