- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
So my first note for everybody is a litttle advice, NEVER CO-SIGN ON A LOAN. After doing some research on the subject I’ve learned nothing good can come of it. Anyhoo, here’s my post…
A little back history here, FI’s younger brother who is 27 is in school still. He has never been responsible with his financial obligations. He had his car repossessed a few months ago and his parents had to bail him out. He’s had his cell phone shut off and Fiance has paid the bill to have it turned back on. He never has money but is always out drinking and partying with his buddies. FBIL works and goes to school at the same time, though his job sketches me out because I don’t believe his employer pays him on a regular basis or in a timely/structured manner. So, before we knew all this and that FBIL is financially unstable & irresponsible, Fiance co-signed on $50k of private student loans for him (about 5 years ago). This is where the trouble starts.
So, as we have just learned, if you co-sign on a loan the lender has NO obligation to inform the co-signer that payments are due, missed or if the account is in default. Turns out while we were getting ready to put an offer on a house, FI’s credit score went down 150 points, from being “Excellent & Higher than average”, to below average and lenders now see him as a high risk. I can not get approved for the amount of mortgage that we need by myself, Fiance makes almost double the amount of money that I do. Fiance can no longer get approved now b/c of this huge blemish on his credit report. So what we found out happened is that one of FBIL’s loans came into repayment. This technically should not have happened since he is still to our knowledge enrolled in school (he says he is at least but now I don’t know what to believe) and loan repayment doesn’t start until 6 months after graduation. Well Future Brother-In-Law should have been done school by now so he should have provided the lenders the proper paperwork to show he is still enrolled when he saw that his first payment was due. Instead, Future Brother-In-Law did nothing… for 109 days. On day 109, our mortgage guy told Fiance about his credit score and Fiance called the COLLECTION AGENCY listed on the credit report and paid the defaulted balance of the loan that day by phone, just a few hundred dollars (of course the collection aganecy freaked him out saying they would come after his assets, savings, house, cars, etc). In addition to when Fiance had the collection agency on the phone he conferenced in his brother and told him about the situation and that he was going to pay it since Future Brother-In-Law has no money. Fiance told his brother he would call him about this when we got back from dinner that night. Well come 8pm, Fiance tried calling his brother and of course no answer. He left a message and his brother never called him back. Since he didn’t get a return call he wrote his brother a huge email and sent it to both his personal and work email accounts. He told his brother that he is going to take over these payments since he can not rely on him to do so. He said that he ruined our chances of buying a home because of the 90 day late status and collection now on his credit report and he can’t get approved for a mortgage. He told his brother to pay him back when he can. The only thing he asked his brother to do immediately is to contact the school and get proof of enrollment so we can send it to the lenders and kindly ask them to remove the blemishes from the credit report. The credit agencies are not required to do this but we can at least try. Well it has been 4 weeks. Future Brother-In-Law has returned no calls, no emails and has not done anything about the loan. We have heard through a mutaul friend of that he has been partying it up, golfing and spending what little money he does have. We tried calling the school and getting proof of enrollment ourselves and they won’t provide it b/c of confidentaility policies. I’m becoming more and more upset. We need a larger house to start a family (our townhouse is too small). This is supposed to be the happiest and most exciting times in our lives and I feel like FI’s brother is ruining it. We now have to budget in an additional $50k in our budget b/c we can’t rely on his brother to pay. We can manage this, but its definitely a burden since I just paid of my school loans and Fiance has his own as well. We had plans to rent the townhouse and buy our new home, which is all being ruined.
So my question to the hive is, do I email Future Brother-In-Law myself??? I know FI’s email wasn’t rude but I’m sure it showed his anger and I’m wondering if that’s why Future Brother-In-Law has not responded? Or I’m thinking Future Brother-In-Law is really embarrassed and too immature to know how to deal with the situation in an adult manner so he’s just ignoring it hoping it will go away (this seems to be his thing)? I just want to email Future Brother-In-Law and ask him to contact the school and have the paperwork faxed to my office, which is private so he wouldn’t have anyone else knowing. I want to tell Future Brother-In-Law we need him to do this because its effecting our lives more than he could ever imagine. Future Brother-In-Law is a REALLY nice guy, he’s just too carefree to the point that he’s irresponsible. If I told Fiance I wanted to do this he would just say no. As of yesterday he said my brother is an “f’n loser and I’m done with him & we need to stop looking at houses for a while” Now I don’t truly believe he’s done with his brother since he only has one and they are really close and have a strong family network,I just think FI’s really angry and hurt. Fiance is also really private and does not talk about Finances/money with anyone, basically just me. To email or not to email, that is the question. (MY BFF said email, but she’s a lot more fiesty than me). What do you girls think? Also any suggestions on repairing his credit would be good too, though acquiring new credit would prolly be pointless since he has credt cars with $30k credit lines and carries a few hundered at a time and pays it off monthly.