(Closed) To "first look" or not to "first look"!?!

posted 4 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
10 posts

Are you a nervous person?    If yes then I say do it.  We have a lot of family from out of town coming plus I sleep way better when Fiance is next to me.  Plus we are taking pics before the wedding.  The only time I will not see him is when I am getting my hair and make up done and the 10 mins before the wedding starts.  If you or your family is really into tradition then maybe you could do what some couples do, where the bride stands behind one side of the door and the groom stands the other.  They hold hands and say a prayer. 

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  • This reply was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by  legobride.
Post # 3
2945 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My Fiance is the person that keeps me calm.  I am already a bit nervous about spending the night before and most of the morning away from him.  I think if I didn’t see him before the wedding, I would have a total panic attack.

Also, getting the photos done before the wedding means I get to enjoy my reception instead of taking pictures while other people get to drink and party. 

Post # 4
5660 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We did it and I have no regrets about doing it vs not. We were able to get all our photo’s taken ahead of time etc and I didn’t want to hold up guests so I could take pics. What I would have done differently is done it privately. It wasn’t really private, our bridal party was milling about, it just could have been a lot more special and intimate than it was. 

I will say t hough that walking down the aisle I barely looked at my husband. I was too busy seeing who was there and looking around, I regret that. I’m not sure that not doing a first look would have changed that, as it’s just kind of my personality to be like oh hi you! oh hi you! and not focus on one thing. But had we not done one I might have paid closer attention?

Post # 5
4040 posts
Honey bee

I missed almost my entire cocktail hour, from taking photos at the church, after the ceremony. My daughter didn’t, because she had a first look, and time for photos with her husband at a park, and with the bridal party, before the wedding. 

Post # 6
9181 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

BlondeeBee:  I reccomend it 100000%.  You get to spend some time together alone on your wedding day (cause that ain’t happening once it starts), and you get to take some amazing photos and thus have more time to spend with guests at the reception.  It’s win-win.

Just FYI, there are ten gazillion posts about this same topic, so if you search the boards you’ll see a ton of people sharing their perspectives.

Post # 7
1618 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May

I would recommend it, especially if you or your Fiance has a tendency to be nervous or shy. For my 1st marriage, we didn’t do a first look and I wish we had. Everyone built up the anticipation of his reaction when he finally saw me and the poor guy looked terrified in pictures. A church full of people and everyone looking at him and him not knowing what to expect of his bride? First Look. Plus it will help to ease that tension of the unknown. It’s a private moment between you two, and I think that’s more romantic than a room full of onlookers gawking at each of you as you first glimpse each other.

Post # 8
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

I’m totally doing it. It’s my second marriage though. 

Ok so here’s my reasoning. My first marriage, not knowing about first looks or anything 20 years ago, I too wanted to see the look on his face as I walked down to have that “moment” with pics afterward before the reception. Well I ugly cried walking down the aisle. The emotions get to you, even if you think they won’t. They do! then pics after the ceremony took wayyy too long..hour and half. family was hard to round up, too many diff pics, etc. 

So…this time, we are doing a first look, having as many pics as we can done before the ceremony, then the last straglers after with the remaining family members and friends, that way we can not have the nerves and “ugly crying” emotions during the ceremony and get to the reception faster with our guests.

Post # 9
8695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

BlondeeBee:  our only regret from our wedding was not doing a first look. Cocktail hour was not enough for our pictures because getting the entire family together (for only one pic!!) took forever. 

Post # 10
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Aww man, it looks like I’m the only bee who’s not planning to do a first look…

The main reason we’re opting out of the First Look is because Fiance is actually the nervous type, and he feels like having the photographer there doing the really formal first look shots will actually put him on the spot more than doing the formals after the ceremony with the party and our families.  

Also, we’re pretty traditional, so to calm the nerves, be near each other, but still keep tradition, we are staying in adjacent hotel rooms, and we are just going to talk and hold hands from around the door.  If that turns into a photo op, then so be it lol (I’ve seen some other couples who have done similar poses and it is really sweet). 

The First look itself will be when I’m walking down the aisle.  Lord knows, we’re both going to be emotional lol (we have 2 photographers shooting, so one will focus on each of us to capture the emotion- we are okay with the raw emotion), and I know I won’t be able to keep my eyes off of him XD

Post # 11
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

BlondeeBee:  When I first started planning my wedding I was pretty set on not having a first look and leaving it for the ceremony, but I also did not want a long gap between the ceremony and reception. It’s next to impossible to nix the first look and go straight from ceremony to reception, so I decided to go ahead and do first look and photos before the ceremony. I am really glad we did it this way, because we had more time for photos and it did take away the stress of walking down the aisle. I also liked that the first look was a moment between just me and my husband (and our photographer), it felt more special that way.

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