(Closed) To have bridesmaids and groomsman or not?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
2202 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

@katherin788:  If he picked his wedding party before you are even officially engaged it  is obvious that it is important for him to include his friends. You should allow him that , IMO. You don’t have to have 4 girls stand up with you. Pick your best friend and that’s that, if you want. 

Post # 4
5708 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@katherin788:  I am not waiting, but just because he has 4 groomsmen doesn’t mean you have to have 4 bridesmaids, or any at all, and it can still work.

Whatever you decide, don’t pick bridesmaids becuase you feel obligated to. Let your DH pick guys that are closest to him because it sounds like it means a lot to him, but perhaps after further discussion you can maybe compromise on the number or roles that they will play.

Post # 6
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I personally don’t want a wedding party for your same reasoning. And I’m the type who has many friends so I would have like a million BMs. I also hated being a bridesmaid so i wouldnt want to be a burden to others pockets lol. would like to use just my only sister as a bridesmaid. I’m sure my guy wouldn’t mind though, he would probably choose his best friend. So far no one has been offended by that decision.

Post # 7
1057 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@katherin788:  I understand. SO would like a bunch of people, and while I do have a lot of good girlfriends, I kind of want to have no one. BUT since I’m ALL about symmetry, I think it would bother me a lot if the sides were uneven. A friend suggested ushers, but even that kind of bothers me. I would just rather not have a Wedding Party.


Post # 8
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@katherin788:  I’m in a similar situation, but with the roles reversed- I have an idea of who I would like my bridesmaids to be, but my BF doesn’t know who he would ask since he doesn’t have many close friends he keeps in touch with.

+1 to PPs who said that the numbers don’t have to be the same on both sides. If he wants to include all his close friends and you only want to include 1, that’s fine if the uneven numbers don’t bother you.

How about just a Maid/Matron of Honor and BM? We are considering doing this. We aren’t engaged yet and won’t be getting married for at least another year and a half, so we have plenty of time to think about this!

Post # 9
757 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@katherin788:  Just because he has four guys he wants to ask doesn’t mean you need to have four girls. You could have none, or one, or two or whatever. Do what works for you :).


Post # 10
1626 posts
Bumble bee

I’m not big on bridal parties either.

Mr VB wants ALL of his brothers in his wedding! I have no sisters!  So we will have a lot to think about when we get engaged LOL

Post # 11
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@katherin788:  I want my sister and adopted sister to be my maids of honour, my son as a ringbearer and my daughter as a flowergirl. My SO can pick whomever he wants. My maids of honour would pick out their own dress in the same colour. I want none of the bridesmaid headache. The last wedding I went to, there was a drunk bridesmaid. 

Post # 12
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

I have 3 wonderful girlfriends that I would be picking if I were getting married tomorrow 🙂 and he would pick his best friend. I’ve never understood the need to have the same number on each side 🙂 

Post # 16
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I wanted no one or just my sister &his best friend for him. Fiance thinks the photos will look weird but that I can go with whatever i want. Being a bridesmaid is stressful and expensive and it is incredibly hard for me to pick people without ending up with too many.


@valardohaeris & katherin788 Maybe the guys can sort of stand a little further off to the side. Im not sure logistically, but yknow to keep them from being all up in your ceremony. Or they could just escort a few close female friends/family members down the aisle and all be seated in the front row


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