- 4 years ago
- Wedding: April 2016
Okay this might be a semi-long post but I’ll try my best to keep it brief.
So my Fiance and I have known this couple (let’s call them David and Janice) for several years now. Fiance actually grew up with Janice and he met David when the two of them got together. I met them both when Fiance and I started dating 4 years ago. Anyway, they have 2 kids together and about 1 year ago they finally got married. We were not invited to the wedding. Then earlier this year it came out that Janice didn’t love David anymore (we all kind of knew this anyway, they only seemed to be together in the first place because of the kids) and had actually been having an affair with his cousin ever since they got married! Now this cousin wasn’t just a normal cousin, their kids called him “Uncle” and he was David’s BEST FRIEND. So lots of drama there. David was still (for reasons unknown to me) in love with Janice so he wanted to try and work it out but a few months ago she and the kids moved out. Finally David is starting to realize what a horrible thing Janice did and that he was actually lucky to get out of the marriage and not waste any more time on her.
Anyway, even though Fiance has known Janice most of his life, they’ve never really been friends (like I said, we weren’t even invited to her wedding). In fact, Janice has never really been too nice to me but whatever. FI’s sister, on the other hand, is Janice’s best friend (she was her MOH). FI’s sister doesn’t condone what Janice did at all (it actually makes her sick) but she’s still her best friend and is there for her. Now David is an awesome guy. Ever since he and Janice broke up earlier this year my Fiance and David have been getting a lot closer. And David and I have been getting closer as well. He even came to an impromptu engagement party that FI’s best man threw for us about a month ago. So Fiance and I have known for a while now that David was going to be invited to our at-home reception (we’re having a small destination wedding and then a big party when we get home). But we talked about it and decided not to invite Janice. This was all decided a few weeks ago when we were trying to finalize our guest list.
Skip to yesterday…I had emailed Future Mother-In-Law and FI’s sister a list of people on FI’s side that they might have addresses for (FI’s sister got married almost 3 years ago so I knew she’d have a lot of info for me). I want to mention also that FI’s sister and I are very close friends. She’s one of my BMs and it’s not just because she’s going to be my SIL, I truly love her. Anyway, I guess FI’s sister mentioned to my Future Mother-In-Law when she saw our list that David was on it and not Janice and that she hoped it was just an oversight. Obviously it was NOT an oversight and I really don’t feel bad about not inviting her. As I said, we’ve never been friends. But now Fiance feels bad. He keeps mentioning that he’s known Janice since he was like 5 and even though the two of them were never really friends maybe we should just invite her. He doesn’t really know what he wants to do.
I’ve told him that we can invite her if he really wants to but that I don’t think he should feel badly if we don’t. But I’m wondering if I should try talking to his sister and try to explain our reasoning? Or he should? What would you Bees do in this situation? The guest list for this at-home reception is already over 250 people and we’re trying to whittle it down wherever possible. I know she’s just one more person but still. What do you think?