Post # 1
Please help ladies with this small problem:
My FI and I recently moved to a new location we have never lived before for his job. A few other couples and their families also were transferred up here. I have gotten to know several of the wives and seen them a few times. It is a pretty tightknit community once you are in this circle of work and so I want to invite them to the wedding and foster the relationship.
However there is one family in particular that I am on the fence about and here is why:
– FI has told me that the guy he works with has rubbed several people the wrong way and he doesn’t seem to be enjoying his job as much as the others.
– The wife had a birthday party for their 1 year old daughter to which we were not invited, but all others were. Perhaps becuase we do not have kids yet? I’m not sure.
I only met his wife one time but when I did, we got along and she seemed very nice and genuine.
What should I do?
Post # 3
If they are a couple you rarely see I would say dont invite them. If they didn’t invite you for whatever reason they probably wont care that they didnt get an invite. Invite who you want there. Its your wedding.
Post # 4
How big is your wedding? Is it a budget killer if you add these two? I’m a “the more the merrier” type, so I always err on the side of inviting folks. However, I guess I need more information on your specific wedding to suggest a call on this one. How do they fit into your vision for the day? If it’s a monster 200 person reception, adding 2 more can’t hurt to keep the peace. If it’s a small, 40 person, intimate affair I say leave them out.
Post # 5
I’m ressurecting this thread today.
I just found out same couple is having a bday party for their other child and again…not invited. Even after I extended an invite to the wedding and all seems well and good when I saw her last at a social gathering.
I dont feel that invites should be based on “I invited you so you ought to invite me” but somehow I feel that this is a bit personal. Perhaps I’m PMSing but I find it a little bit rude.
If they’re at the wedding fine and I’ll say my hellos but that’s about the last social gathering I’m going to try to muster up a friendship.
Post # 6
Does everyone else have kids? If she only invited families with kids, I wouldn’t take it personally.
Post # 7
@PinkPinstripes: Everyone else does have kids except for one couple (who I don’t know for sure are invited).
I’m trying to be the bigger person about this and maybe they wont even come to the wedding. but Darn it, this is such a small po dunk town we moved to and it’s a small social circle to start with that I should get over it and not take it personally but it just really irks me.
Post # 8
if you dont have kids im pretty sure thats why you are not invited to the birthday party…
Post # 9
Yeah I’m sure it’s just because you don’t have kids. My own best friend asked me if I wanted to be invited to her daughter’s second birthday. She’s inviting the moms who she now knows through her daughther, but she probably didn’t want to “burden” me with an invite if I wasn’t interested. I love children so I said sure and I’m looking forward to it.
These days, some people give parents a bad rap so they’re cautious not to burden the child free, I feel.
Post # 10
@earthbiscuit: I voted for yes, because after reading your post, it sounded like they were nice people (at least the wife), and living in a new area and developing relationships with this tight knit group would be a good thing. But I do also think they could have extended the invite to the birthday party for their 1 year old, even if you don’t have kids. If you really didn’t care for this one couple I would say don’t invite them … you should have people you really like at your wedding!