Post # 1
I had written an original post about how upset I was about my father’s GF trying to get into my wedding where she wasn’t wanted and how angry I was at her, my dad, and basically everyone for not allowing me and my FH to have a great day about us. Here is the original post (it’s long and very detailed):
My father’s health continued to deteriorate as time went on, he had a stroke at Christmas and things continued to worsen. However, my family decided it would be best to keep the seriousness of it from me as the wedding was only a couple of weeks away. Neither my father, his GF, nor my grandmother were at the wedding. My brother tried to tell me how bad things were with my dad before I left on the wedding night, but I wasn’t nearly prepared when I traveled and saw my father the next day. He was at the brink of death and had barely held on so that he could see me as a married woman. They told me that he had kept saying that he had to get ready for the wedding and asking for a wheelchair so he could come to the wedding. That is a bittersweet memory for me. My last conversation with my dad was a short affair, as he could barely stay conscious – but he asked if I was a married woman, I had him feel my rings together (he could no longer see), and our last words to each other were “I love you”. They turned off his IV’s the next day and transferred him to hospice care. He passed away that Thursday afternoon.
It’s amazing how stupid and trivial things like my original post seem to me now that my dad is gone. Let me tell you something: Enjoy your wedding day, it’s one of the most important days of your life! Just don’t let yourself get so caught up in the crap of the wedding whirlwind that you forget the important things… like I did. Cherish every moment you have with your loved ones, you never know how much time you have left with them.
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2014 - Mauritius
@MrsJ2Bee: I’m so very sorry for your loss and thank you for some perspective x
Post # 4
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story and perspective.
Post # 5
I’m sorry for your loss, and thank you for some perspective!
Post # 6
Oh my goodness, so sorry to hear you update. My condolences. But you are right, we fuss and give weight to things that really don’t matter in the end. Thank you for the reminder.
Post # 7
My dad is dying, so I understand. However just because I am going through something serious doesn’t mean that others’ problems are any less legitimate. Small, everyday stressors really suck too and my feelings don’t invalidate theirs. Yes, don’t sweat the small stuff is a good message but if something bothers you, that isn’t going to vanish just because strangers had a relative pass away.
Post # 8
@MrsPanda99: I don’t think she meant “Don’t worry about the things you’re worried about because my dad just died”. I think she means “I wish I hadn’t spent so much time and energy being mad about my dad’s gf because now that he’s gone I see how silly it was”. More don’t worry about YOUR little things and focus on YOUR big things.
Post # 9
@MrsJ2Bee: I’m so sorry about your loss but glad you were able to have a special, beautiful moment with your dad before he passed. Take lots of time to take care of yourself!
Post # 10
@MexiPino: That makes more sense. I suppose I read it wrong. A lot of people seem to think their big issues mean others’ smaller issues are trivial. I don’t think that’s the case. I can still be annoyed that flowers are expensive and care about my dad. I suppose I’m just sensitive about the whole thing.
Post # 11
@MrsJ2Bee: I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your update.
Post # 12
@MrsPanda99: You’re going through it right now, so yeah…. I would have totally read that wrong or just put more into it than was there right after mom’s death. For me, I was totally aware that other people still had problems…. I just didn’t want to hear about them. Made life as a Complaint Department Rep at a travel agency SUUUUPER fun. “Oh, you don’t like the design on the chair in your 5 star hotel room? MY MOM JUST DIED SO STFU!” siiiigh