(Closed) To pick up, or not to pick up??

posted 11 years ago in Family
  • poll: What would you do?

    Pick them up and change other plans/meetings around and be their chauffeur for the weekend

    Politely suggest that they rent a car to get them around the city our wedding venue is in

    Just say you're unable to do it

    other: please explain below!

  • Post # 17
    13094 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I just want to add another thought – a lot of people seem to be saying to have someone else get them, hire a driver, get an hotel shuttle, etc.  But if these guests don’t have transportation to and from the airport on their own, how do they intend to get around all weekend?  Are they just planning to bum rides off of other people?  I think it is rude to go out of town and not figure out your own means of transportation.

    Post # 18
    234 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I would def let your Fiance handle this, if she’s his favorite aunt and tends toward being a diva.  Personally, if you all can’t get her and no one else can either, I’d send back a breezy e-mail about how great it will be to see them, and here are the names of the best local cab company/airport shuttle service, or how you negotiated a group discount with the XXX car rental company, and you’re just so excited that they’ll be celebrating with you!  Maybe also mention that you’re glad they’re arriving early to enjoy the destination, and you wish you could take advantage of that time too, but you know you’ll be cloistered away making placecards/assembling bouquets/doing whatever it is you’ll be doing.  There’s a good chance she didn’t realize how busy you’d be, and if you deflect the question instead of saying “we can’t pick you up because we’re too busy” then you don’t give her the opportunity to say “I can’t believe you’re too busy for me etc etc” and the whole thing can just blow over.

    Post # 19
    4464 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    @FutureKMM: That’s actually not that surprising to me.  I have family members flying in who would need a ride from the airport, but would ride with other family once they got here.

    Post # 20
    4023 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I agree with KMM. If I were going to a destination wedding, I would definitely be figuring out my own transportation for the whole weekend. Even if it was to get rides from people, I would have it all planned out and would NEVER expect the bride or groom to drive me anywhere. Even if it was like my sister, or BFF, I think its rude to just assume that.

    Post # 21
    13094 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    @ hotchildinthecity – I agree that they may be riding with other family throughout the weekend and have already arranged that.  I don’t have a problem with that if that is truely their plan.  But if that’s the case, I still think they should get their own taxi from the airport if that other family isn’t in town yet.  The bride and groom and their immeadiate family have too much on their plates the few days before the wedding to be trying to pick people up from the airport (especially if it requires over an hour of driving time to do so).

    Post # 23
    3124 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    I would give her some suggestions but not long drawn out researched ones – you can take a cab, train, bus, or rent a car. Here is a phone book.. or google.

    It’s a little silly that they couldn’t do this on their own, or talk to another family member. Yes, let me have the bride and groom shuttle me around while they’re super busy. Please..

    Post # 24
    3219 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I was in the middle of commenting on this yesterday and then my boss walked in and had to x out! im glad i just saw it again!

    I dont think you should have to be picking them up . I would never go on a vacation/ away for a wedding and expect to be picked up. I would have rented a car if i was them.

    Im guessing they have been married before and know how much goes into having a wedding and that you will have no time to be picking up or droping off anyone.

    at the most if they throw a stink you could pay for a cab i guess, but IMO you shouldnt have to

    Post # 26
    2788 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    Beause the email was addressed to you, your Fiance and Future Father-In-Law, I would call Future Father-In-Law and ask him to handle this.  He can explain that you too will be busy, and that he will not be there in time. Then he can suggest they take a cab.  Normally, I am not one to shove work onto someone else (ie FFIL) but since he got the email also, I say let him speak with her.

    Post # 27
    1684 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    I’m in total agreement with finnaroo. I think your Future Father-In-Law should know how to handle it best. It’s your FI’s family, so someone should be able to grab Grandma & Auntie from his side. It shouldn’t be you or your Fiance if you have vendor meetings but I would go out of my way to make some plans for another relative to do it. 

    Post # 28
    5920 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Ouch.  That’s a tricky one.  I would try to arrange a shuttle, taxi, etc. from the airport for them and pay.  It shows that you are appreciative of them coming, and although you are very busy, you are still thougtful.

    Post # 29
    69 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Are they elderly? If no one in your family can pick them up, then you should arrange transportation for them.

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