Post # 1
help! I signed up for this week’s ‘shut it up’ pact, and I have no resolve and I already broke it!! Now what?
At lunch today wandered into my (1 block away from work) local, ethically sourced jewelry store to take a look again at their rings. I went there with my boyfriend a few weeks ago, and since then, they got a new ring, and it’s gorgeous! It’s an oval, rose cut sapphire, bezel set with a halo of diamonds around it, in unplated white gold. I love it! It’s reasonably priced! I also already sent my boyfriend an email with a few ring styles I like, with reasons why I like each, a few weeks ago, but then just today I felt desperate to tell him about this one now too. I took pictures of it on my hand, and the original ring there that I also love, which is something new I’ve not done before. I have them on my phone, and I want to send them to him.
Well, I couldn’t resist, and I started gchatting my boyfriend about these two rings (the original one I really liked and the new one, saying “I doubt you’ve already bought a ring, but just in case you have, you can ignore this, but otherwise… I went back into the store today on my lunch break and… etc.” and he responded with “I think you should cool your jets babe” and then signed offline. I feel so bad now. I didn’t get a chance to show him the rings, and I am super embarrassed that I’m bringing it up and he’s not receptive. I am at work and feel like crying. He is taking me to yosemite this weekend for my birthday and I was secretly hoping I’d get proposed to then. Both of the rings are one of a kind, ready to be sold, and one doesn’t even need to be resized. He totally could get them in time. But really, I guess it’s just me hoping that it’s happening, and it’s not really happening yet. I highly doubt he reacted that way because he’s already bought a ring. I mean, who knows, but probably not.
Should I still text him the photos, or not even do that?
Post # 3
I would not text him the photos. He told you to cool your jets so you should cool them. When it’s time for a ring you’ll find another perfect one or you may still be able to get that one.
I would leave it alone.
Post # 4
What? No. Sister, listen to him – he’s telling you to cool your jets. So you need to cool your jets. No more pictures/texts/chats. Give it a rest for a while.
Post # 5
I think you should just not bring up rings, wedding, etc. for awhile. I know with my SO if I don’t bring it up for a week or so he thinks something is wrong with me lol and then he brings it up. I would just take a day for you and regroup. Then after you are back to normal drown him with love and don’t bring weddings etc up.
Post # 6
No no no no!! Do not text him the pictures. He told you to cool off so LISTEN!
Post # 7
He either told you to cool your jets and signed off because (1) he already bought you your ring and he doesn’t want to see that you don’t like it anymore because you like something new or (2) he’s just really tired of hearing about it all the time and maybe he’s busy with some other things and it’s not really at the top of his mind right now.
I wouldn’t send him the pictures. Instead, post the pictures on here for us to see! In the meantime, wait until he’s receptive to hearing about it and then talk to him about it. And by wait, I mean – wait until he brings it up himself first.
Post # 9
@boardersarita: “I think you should cool your jets babe” and then signed offline.
Enough said…. no more talk of rings and no pics.
Post # 10
I think you should post them HERE!!! showwww. Lol
Post # 11
You guys are all so good at helping me regain focus and yeah, you are right, I need to wait! It’s hard to do, it’s like I go 4 hours feeling great and independent and empowered, and then boom, outta the blue it’s like a wave of total obsession, whether excitement because I know it IS coming one day, or sadness that it hasn’t happened yet. Tonight he is going bowling with friends so after I drive us home (I’m picking him up from work) and we get dinner quickly, I’ll have the apartment to myself and can hopefully distract myself with girly tv or a good book. Tomorrow night I’m taking a yoga class and he is going out with friends too to play basketball, so that’s more time apart. At this point, time apart is necessary, if we are together its often SO hard not to talk about it. And a day or two from now, you are right, I’ll be refreshed again and hopefully back to being patient. 😉
I can post pictures here though, I like that idea! I’ll do that once I figure out how to get them from my phone to my computer. Work is slow today so I have time.
Post # 12
I can understand your embarassment. I honestly would be embarassed too. But it’s okay; just shake it off.
Don’t send the pictures though…but I really like the idea of showing us the pictures! 😉
Post # 13
So here you are ladies:
First, the first ring I tried on at the store and liked. Not anything like I thought I wanted (I always am drawn to halos, and white gold) but it was just gorgeous on my finger, and super simple. It’s about a .5 carat rose cut diamond, in rose gold, bezel set. I like the color with my skin, and I like that it’s lowprofile, and kinda smaller, so it’s not too blingy. I’m a social worker, and don’t wanna wave around too many big diamonds in front of my really poor clients. I’ve come back to the store and tried this ring on like 3 times, and I just keep wanting to put it on my finger. It even is already exactly my size!
Second is the new ring they had there, that is totally more like what I ‘usually’ am drawn to, which is a sapphire, also rose cut, in a diamond halo, in white gold. It’s kind of see-through blue because of the rose cut, which I like. It’s also low-profile, but a lot bigger/blingier. Despite that, it’s cheaper, since it’s a sapphire stone and not a diamond for the main stone. Price is definitely a thing here, since my boyfriend just finished graduate school and is starting his career, and we are both pretty practical people, and are looking to buy a house in the next few years.
Sorry for my fingers looking all weird and crooked in my pictures, I gotta learn a better angle to take photos from!
Post # 14
@boardersarita: Oh wow those are beautiful! I especially love how the sapphire in the 2nd ring is kind of see through! Gorgeous rings.
Just wait until he brings it up again and then you’ll be able to send these to him, I’m sure.
Post # 15
@boardersarita: I agree with the PP, just enjoy the photos for yourself and leave it be. I know it is hard to not share once we find something we love but it can really do some damage if he isn’t open to the idea. Have you guys discussed marriage yet? You said you went to the store together…was that his idea?
Have a great time in Yosemite and try not to focus on the potential proposal. It is my favorite place on earth (my DH proposed to me in the snow at Bridalveil falls in Yosemite) and I’m sure it would make for an epic weekend if he proposed but no less amazing if he doesn’t. Enjoy yourself!!!
Post # 16
@Treejewel19: yeah, we’ve discussed marriage a lot, and we are both sure we are getting married. We talk about when we will have kids (in the next few years – I’m 29 and he’s 31), we’ve looked sort of casually at houses we want to buy, we have a joint banking account, we live together, etc. However, going to the store was my idea. He was in a great mood that day (he had just presented his thesis for his graduate program and passed!), and we were in the neighborhood getting dinner, and he agreed. He asked questions, was involved, etc. Then, again, my idea, I offered to send him ring pictures of rings I like. He agreed, and got specific with asking me to do it a certain way to give him more info. I was surprised, and pleased, even though I brought it up, not him. Originally he’d said he was traditional, and since he’s a graphic designer and gotten me jewelry before, I should just let him do this on his own (this is like a year or two ago), but it’s hard for me not to have input. So now, I’m so surprised and happy that I got to give some input. I really can’t keep doing this though because at some point (and maybe already!) I will do damage! That’s the last thing I want!