Post # 1

Member
14 posts
Newbee
UGHH! My family doesn’t think we should send out save the dates, but I want to. The fiance has family out of state and I think we need to at least send them something telling them the date, but is it necessary to send it to all of the family already in state let alone in town? I just need some help deciding and I’d love to hear any opinions and reasonings!
Post # 3

Member
353 posts
Helper bee
Depends on how many of your guests are out of towners. Our wedding was 75% so we mailed STD’s six months before but if it’s just a small amount then maybe just email them? Depends on how formal you want to be but printing less the 10 STD’s seems like a waste of money.
Post # 4

Member
33 posts
Newbee
I say send them if you want. My family is all out of town, and his family, which is much larger, is local. We only sent them to the out-of-state people who would need to make travel arrangements. We did not send them to the locals. Hope that helps…
Post # 5

Member
78 posts
Worker bee
Why don’t they want you to send them? Is it cost? I did mine for $37 (postage included) for 80 STDs. We sent them out since the majority are out of state, and sent them out 6 1/2 months before hand. If you want to send em, send em! I think its always helpful to have more info than not.
Post # 6

Member
1465 posts
Bumble bee
If you want to send them, then that is your decision, no one else’s. If someone does not like your choice, they can do their own thing at their own wedding. Also, it has nothing to do with being out of town or in town. Lots of people who live in the same town as the couple have have incredibly busy lives and will greatly benefit from save the dates, which are generally sent 12 months before the wedding date. The same applies if your wedding is around a holiday, in which everyone, regardless of where they live, needs the same information well ahead of time.
Send them out to everyone. Also, they do not have to be expensive or elaborate at all.
Post # 7

Member
493 posts
Helper bee
If you’re going to send save the dates I think you should probably send them to ALL the guests, not just the ones who are out of town. If some people get save the dates and others don’t, they might assume that they aren’t invited to your wedding because you didn’t send them one… I can just see some feelings potentially hurt (people are weird about things like that sometimes). I’ve heard about save the date post cards that don’t cost as much postage wise and might be the most affordable way to go. Obviously you always have the option of just emailing or calling people.. in which case I don’t think you need to necessarily contact all your guests (you can just keep it to the out of town ones) and clearly doesn’t cost you anything but you’ll still achieve your goal of giving them the heads up.
Post # 8

Member
4485 posts
Honey bee
Send them out to everyone. Where they live is completely moot and everyone needs to have the same advance notice to prepare.
Post # 9

Member
375 posts
Helper bee
Send them out. I love getting them because I am able to block the weekend and plan ahead. I am surprised now to get JUST the wedding invite… and sometimes have already committed to another event when I get them 2-3 months in advance.
Plus, with airlines and airfare, if you want to use miles or find a cheap flight, it helps to have as much heads-up time as possible.
Do post cards, since the postage is a lot cheaper.
Post # 10

Member
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
We didn’t do them. We had a four month engagement, and told all the people we really wanted there. The bonus to this way is that there were some people I had to invite who I was hoping wouldn’t come, so I didn’t want to give too much notice there. I wanted to spend the time and money on other things. BUT- it’s your wedding, you only do it once, do what makes you happy.