(Closed) To wait or not to wait?

posted 4 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
1970 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I personally wouldn’t have gone and picked my own ring if I wanted a surprise.  I have a love/hate relationship with surprises but I wanted my engagement to be one of them since there aren’t that many grand surprises in life. I showed my Fiance what I liked online and then we looked at rings in person and he saw exactly what I wanted. I left it alone after that and let him pick it. He got exactly what I wanted with an even better quality diamond. I think the surprise of the whole thing is the moment they pull out a ring and ask and you had no idea it was coming at that time. Thats just me though.  I personally think the fact that you’ve gone through all of this to get the ring and all, there isn’t much of a surprise left. It’s kinda just a connect-the-dots thing to wait to get it so you can start planning?

Post # 3
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

My automatic response would have been “You put that ring on my finger and you will never get it back!”


So, no.  I would not be ok with waiting.  To each their own, but you have to decide for yourself what you are ok with and make sure that the two of you are on the same page.

Post # 5
9758 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

I think you would be surprised how many of us did not have surprise proposals. In my case, I was along for every step of the way but DH still made it a point to get down on a knee and do a formal proposal in front of our friends after he got the ring.

Post # 6
1593 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
whattodonow :  Why don’t you tell him that you don’t want to okay the ring this weekend and to propose to you on his own timing? Did the jeweler have a deadline to okay the ring? Mine didn’t. I took it back a week after the proposal to get it sized properly and got it back at the end of the same day.

Post # 8
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2017 - historical mansion

I was in a similar situation as you, OP. My husband and I picked out a ring design to be custom made at a local jeweler. They had his contact info and called him when it was ready. I didn’t know when the ring would be made or when the proposal would come but I knew it would be by the end of June. I forget why that time period was chosen. Anyway, he proposed on May 21 and it was lovely and I was still surprised. So it is possible to pick out a ring together and still have a romantic proposal. 🙂

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