Post # 1
Today I decided to leave.
I can’t stand the disorganization, the hoarding attitude and the dust and dirt that permeates this place. I am not a maid (clean up, wash dishes/splattered stove after he cooks, go fetch dishes from under the bed etc…) nurse (massage him where he is sore, get him his pills every time) mother (personal alarm clock, remind him of appointments) although he thinks I should be all of those without question. I have decided after 5 years to leave a man whom I thought was funny, loving and caring. I thought I would spend the rest of my life with this man who doesn’t know the difference between clean and messy, respect and being rude, his feelings and my feelings.
He has gotten me in trouble with the law; there is no trial since I am pleading guilty even though it was totally his fault that the charges were laid. He will be pleading guilty too, both of us will have a suspended sentence, I don’t want a “round 2” either, so I am “skipping town” by not being with him if he gets reported again of the same charges.
His love for pride overshadows all things. He has made a life for himself where I am not welcomed even though I live with him. I still live out of a “box”. My computer sits on the coffee table where I type this, as many other posts before, from the couch. I look over to the right where my “stuff” is stuffed in a chest under the window. My clothes are still in bags and I am just wearing a few pieces over and over. The bedrooms and livingroom/dining room are a stacked full of things that there is no way I can “organize” this without strong opposition from the owner of these “things”. I think I am just one of his “things” that he acquires and expects me to clean up after him clean this home which is very difficult with all his stuff all over the place
So I am taking this week to take my “shit” out to my mom’s place, a little at a time, so it’s not too noticeable to him, while I make claim I am finally organizing “our home”.
Then on Friday, I am taking the last things that are noticeable – computer etc… after he leaves for his “day job” and then waiting for him to come home to tell him I am going. Hopefully all will go well.
Thank you bees, for this week only, I will be sporadic in my posting.
Thanks for all of your support and finally I am listening to some of your and my own advice!
Post # 3
@happyface: I am so sorry!! It sounds like you need a MAJOR *HUG* – I hope everything goes well for you. Be strong in your decision. If you’re unhappy and nothing’s changed, then you need to find someone who will make you happy. You don’t deserve anything less! Good luck with moving all your stuff and leaving him, if that’s what makes you happy.
Post # 4
Best of luck to you <3 We are all here for you!
Post # 5
*HUGS* Good luck, Dear! This might be the hard decision to make but it is a wise one!
Post # 6
Good luck to you! It seems you’ve really thought this through. I hope this transition in your life goes smoothly and you can move on to bigger and better things!
Post # 7
I’m sorry that you have to go through this. Good luck and I’ll be sending you stregnth and hugs from Missouri.
Post # 8
I know this has been a tough decision for you, but it sounds like the best thing to do. You deserve someone who cares for you and welcomes you with open arms, not someone that gets you in trouble with the law and expects you to do every little thing for him. I don’t have any advice, but I wish you all the best. You’re a strong woman, and I think this will make your life a lot easier. You deserve to be happy.
Post # 9
I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this! It sounds like you have made the right decision though and have a well thought out plan. Just want to give you a huge hug right now. You’re going to get through this and be just fine! Bigger and better things await you! 🙂
Post # 10
Sounds like you have a plan to move your life forward and build your happiness again. I wish you all the best. Seems like you’re making the right decision.
Post # 11
@happyface: ((((So many Hugs)))) and prayers and thoughts and well wishes… It sounds like you are doing the right (but extraordinarily difficult) thing.
Post # 12
@happyface: Thinking about you! Hang in there!!!!! It sounds like you are doing the right thing.
Post # 13
Wow, I’m so sorry to hear things got this bad, but I’m glad you’re doing the right thing for you. Best of luck in whatever is to come, my friend!
Post # 14
As difficult as this is, this is a new start and I can almost guarantee it will feel like a weight has been lifted once you are out. You will soon see a new future, without this stress, full of exciting possibilities even if they are yet unknown.
Take care of yourself, and lots of virtual hugs.
Post # 15
Much love and hugs!!! It’s a hard decision to make and I really applaud you for doing it.
Post # 16
You sound strong and prepared to take on a new life. You are so right – you are a woman who deserves respect and love from your partner – not a maid, nurse, and mother to a man who doesn’t get that, nor an item to collect.
Wishing you the very best!