Post # 1
Looking for others who have felt this way and how you handled it.
There are a thousand DJs, photographers, officiants, dresses, etc, and I just don’t understand how I’m supposed to find one so much better than the rest. Dress, I guess, it might just hit me when I start trying them on, but DJs? Come on, they’re all the same! And they don’t even put prices on their websites so I have to reach out and talk to them and all I really want to know is “how much do you charge and is it cheaper than the other 50 DJs in this area”. I just don’t care enough to be wasting time on this.
Yes, I know I could get a planner, but that just seems wasteful because I have the time to organize things myself, I’m just bad at it. And so now a month has gone by and I haven’t made any movement on anything (we do have the date chosen and the reception venue booked, which includes food) and I’m worried that the next 11 months will go by and I still will have done nothing and the whole thing will fall apart.
Anyone have ideas for how I can make myself give a shit about all this planning stuff?
Post # 2
Hire a planner. Having the time to do something is great, but it’s only a part of the equation. If hiring a planner will make this process easier for you, hire one. The search for a good planner might feel just like searching for a DJ, but after you find a good one and hire them, they’ll make hiring all those other vendors a lot easier.
If you still don’t want to do that, you can ask people whose weddings you attended recently and whose vendors you enjoyed for recommendations.
Post # 3
Gah. While I don’t what your apathy, the lack of prices on vendor websites is so frustrating. Emailing 10 photographers just to find out they are double my budget. Their response seems so personal it’s hard to just not respond. Makeup artists who never respond. It’s all annoying. Wish prices were more transparent – I don’t care how charming your email is, if you’re overbudget, it’s a no.
Post # 4
sounds like you’d benefit from a more chill wedding. You don’t have to have a DJ and lights and a special dance floor. You don’t have to go nuts with your dresses, hair, makeup – just get what’s comfortable and DIY the hair/makeup as you typically would. I think focusing your research on getting a great photographer and excellent food is really all that’s fully necessary. Ask a good friend or family member to officiate and either get online ordained or have a quickie ‘ceremony’ at the courthouse just before (if it won’t have special meaning to you). Speakers and a planned playlist can be your music if you want. Or ask for recommendations from friends who have already gotten married. Additionally, talk to your fiance. What’s most important to him? Entrust those particular vendors to him and don’t even worry about it yourself. Last, a google search for DJs or other vendors will give you star ratings – don’t even bother with the ones whose ratings are crap. That’ll probably cut your list in half easily.
Post # 5
I gave all the stuff I was/am apathetic toward to Fiance lol. Don’t forget you’re a team!
Post # 6
I didn’t worry about finding the “best” I looked for the first one that had good reviews, seemed good when I met with them, and was in my price range. It all worked out, my wedding was perfect even without out stressing out over whether every vendor I hired was the best.
Post # 7
Yep that was me. Only cared about a good photographer. Our venue was all inclusive. Just keep your head up.
Post # 8
Can you ask the reception venue for a list of their recommended vendors?
Post # 9
Wait… you’ve picked your date, reception and caterer all within one month? You are so far ahead of me at the same stage!
I don’t see the point of getting a planner. Just do things together with your Fiance.
Post # 10
Figure out what’s important to you, research that stuff, and for the rest just find something in your price range and feels like a good fit. Yeah, you have to reach out to everyone But it can be a form email. “Looking for a dj for my June eleventeeth wedding. Can you let me know what if you’re available and what your packages are?”
As long as they don’t have terrible reviews, you’ll be fine. You can make yourself go mad if you research everything. They don’t have to be the absolute best of the best for you and your guests to still have an amazing time.
Post # 11
I have to admit that I have felt a bit apathetic towards wedding planning at times. I actually tried to set myself something (or somethings) to do each month just to make sure I wouldn’t slack off and leave it all to the last minute lol. So, in January we were looking at celebrants. In February we were looking at photographers and I was shopping for my dress (only took one trip). In March we were looking for our band. In April we were looking at florists. In May I was looking at hair stylists and makeup artists. Etc etc.
Post # 12
This can work in your favor. If you find a vendor within your budget, and you like their work, book them. Don’t look around for something better or fail to book them because you aren’t freaking out over them. You will plan your wedding so quickly and so easily.
Post # 13
Why don’t you ask your current vendors who they recommend? That way you already know that they work well with each other!
On the plus side, you have quite a bit of time.
With the exception of photography, I pretty much went with the 1st person I spoke with. Wedding still on its way, so we’ll see how it all works out!
Post # 14
I’m so glad that I read this post… I care about some things (venue, dress, photographer), but I REALLY don’t care about others. Cars/ Hair and Make Up/ Cake/ Celebrant… all of those seem so similar and hard to pick online (and to be honest- I hate making phone calls so will avoid those if I can)!
I can’t advise you on what you should do, but I have found that making decisions about some things has made me happier, and like I’m ‘doing something’ 🙂 (short engagement helps!)
Post # 15
You man make a post on Thumbtack stating the price you want to pay, and then vendors reply to you with their offers (usually under your budget). It’s easy to do, and you know that all of the ones reaching out to you are available on your day, and under budget. All you have to do then is pick one with good reviews.