(Closed) Too old to be a ring bearer

posted 7 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I don’t have kids, but my younger brother is only 12 (a mature 12 I must add). When it came to deciding his role in my wedding, it was easy for me. I’ve never had a relationship with my father, so it felt only right to ask my brother to walk me down the aisle. So he’s taking on duties that a FOTB normally would. 

If I was in your situation, however, I think I’d ask your step son whether he’d like to be a ring bearer. He might love the idea, and age doesn’t matter. You could decide to make him a groomsmen, but with that normally comes a lot of responsibility. Either way, it doesn’t matter whether your step son had an official ‘title’ such as groomsmen, ring bearer, etc as he’ll still be part of your day x

Post # 4
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Our son will be 10 and he is a jr. groomsman. He will stand with the rest of the groomsmen.

 

 

Post # 5
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think it would be cute to have him a s jr. groomsman. Keep in mind that you dont have to have a ring bearer. I think in that situation the best man usually hangs on to the ring. But maybe you could make that his job?

Post # 7
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Could he be the Best Man or Co-Best Man?  When we weren’t sure if my FI’s best friend would be able to make it to New Husband for the wedding we considered having FI’s 4 year old son be the “Best Man”.

Post # 8
Member
875 posts
Busy bee

You know you could give him the honor of being the real ring bearer…  ie really having the responsiblity of presenting the rings to you, and you could get creative with the title of this job calling him the “presenter of the rings.”  Then change what his job will look like… entering with the groomsmen and not walking in the bride’s processional.  Giving him an official role that has appropriate meaning and real responsiblity would make the job a bigger honor. 

Post # 9
Member
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My nephew will be 8 and I also thought we was too old to be a ring bearer so he is going to be an usher and also probably walk my neice, who’s a jr. bridesmaid, down the aisle since my brother had todrop out last minute.  He won’t stand up there though becuase he would get a little antsy.

Post # 10
Member
239 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My 18 year old brother is going to be our ring bearer. He’s a gangly 6’5″ and a little goofy, and he fits perfectly with our family-centric, casual outdoor wedding plan.

So I think you get to decide for yourself how old is too old, and maybe make him a junior groomsman like others suggested.

Post # 11
Member
349 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Our son will be 6 at the time of the wedding and we are calling him the groomsmini.

He will have a tux and a bout like all of the boys, and he will walk in the processional with them, but during the ceremony he will be sitting next to my mom.

 

Post # 12
Member
509 posts
Busy bee

I think it depends on how tall he is. I went to a friends wedding, and her ringbearer was…get this… 13. And like, REALLY tall. I’m sorry, but it looked so stupid having him walk down the aisle with the ringbox open. (At least he wasn’t carrying a ring pillow!)

 

I would maybe have him stand with the groomsmen, and you could have the flower girl stand witht he bridesmaids. That way they can still do what you want them to do, but they’ll just blend in afterward.

Post # 13
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

There’s no age limit on a ring bearer. Does not have to be small child, even though it usually is. I don’t think he has to walk with the ring box open and make a display of it, though. He could just walk down the aisle to honor him, and then be the one that hands the ring. WE had a grown woman as our ring bearer 🙂

Post # 14
Member
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My son will be 11 and he is going to be the ring bearer. For me it just is the right role for him. I was a single mom and raised him on my own so it is very important to me that he is the one giving the ring to my FH to place on my hand. I don’t care what etiquette says 🙂

Post # 15
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@MsSparklyBee: I dont think 10 is too young to be a ring bearer. I think 14+ is too old. I mean if you really feel uncomfortable with it you could always have him be a jr. groomsman.

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